Time to start stopping

Blondie

Blondie

Respected Member
Hey Dylank. Nice job with your success. "About the question before, is it wrong for example to do a 'M' without anything else?" Well first of all, I don't think it's wrong to do M, certainly not morally wrong. However, masturbation is something I would suggest refraining from for the time being (maybe 3 months), just because your mind right now probably has a hard time separating M from P, and M could lead you to a relapse.

I most definitely would not be looking at porn in anyway shape or form, because porn's the devil that brought you here in the first place, and morality has nothing to do with it. Your life without porn will be better in every way, not to mention your sex life! Trust me on this.

As far as noticing sexy women when out and about, there's nothing wrong with that, and is completely normal if you're a healthy male (as long as you're not being a creeper and staring at them inappropriately). But of course, you have to ask yourself, is it beneficial for you to let your mind fantasize about every woman you see? Now I'm not saying you do this by the way, it's just something to think about in case you do it even a little bit. I've learned, and I say this as a man who is in complete awe of the fairer sex; that there's a very big difference between a man noticing a beautiful woman who happens to come into his view, as opposed to a man being constantly on the lookout and scoping for hotties 24/7. The first man has a mission in life, yet notices beauty and thanks the gods for it whenever he sees it, the latter has no mission in his life except lust in his heart. Now don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with lusting per se (I'm no moralist), but you do have to ask yourself this question, is lust getting the upper hand?

Just my two cents.

But whatever you do, porn is not your friend! You got this.
 
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dylank

Member
so i guess this makes day 24!
I lost track of time a bit, but guess that's a good thing. Mostly stuck with work last few days but that prevents getting in a negative cycle. I'm really hoping to go past a month, havent done that like... ever!?
No real flatlining or anything. I think the erections get harder when not PMO-ing, and the libido is up, just like the frequency of sex.
What really helps me right now is doing workouts, strenuous weight lifting which replaces the dopamine urge big time. For now replacing my 2 addictions with a healthy alternative seems fine. When the dopamine urge lessens I can relax a bit more I hope. For now I'm doing good at work, health and family time. Friends a bit less, need to connect some more next couple of months.
 
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MJ1987

Member
Keep going man!

I'm on day 2 now, and much of what you wrote I recognise from earlier reboot attempts.

I've also never reached beyond 1 month so also curious how things will look for you once you cross that mental barrier.
 
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dylank

Member
MJ1987 said:
Keep going man!

I'm on day 2 now, and much of what you wrote I recognise from earlier reboot attempts.

I've also never reached beyond 1 month so also curious how things will look for you once you cross that mental barrier.
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thanks friend! Will keep you posted!
 
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dylank

Member
Day 29!
So, almost a month and almost a personal record.
Beat thing is I'm not really triggered because of the fact I'm seldom alone. Besides that the sex is frequent and that helpes with the urges.
Getting spontaneous erections and the sex feels more natural.
Overall doing fine. I think I'm receiving some dopamine kicks by doing physical exercises but I think for now that is a good enough replacement for the PMO.

However, I still think it's really hard to look away from all the semi-porn. Like, real porn is something you surf to or actively search for and you can repress. But the semi stuff like instagram-pictures, random internet encounters, hot girls on facebook, or even on the telly are hard to miss. How do you guys cope with that stuff?
 
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dylank

Member
I'll try to answer these questions for now.

Did I use porn today?
-No
What were my triggers?
-being alone
How did I soothe my anxiety or stress?
- by going over here and being busy with work
What am I grateful for today?
- Having a relaxed evening
Day counter: 30
 
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dylank

Member
33 days now.
Ill keep it short.
Erections get rock hard, in the morning and while having sex.

I'm less afraid of failing so the sex gets better: it's more relaxed, different positions, longer stamina, and I'm more in the moment, more reactive to her.
 
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dylank

Member
Day 37. I've read messages from some guys who noticed their dreams get different. Last week I have more vivid dreams and I have the feeling my sleep is a bit different, deeper, more intense. Don't know if related. Sex is lots better. I would think that without PMO the O would be faster, but in fact it's the opposite, like longer stamina, more self-control. Awesome stuff.
 
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Deleted member 27008

Guest
dylank said:
Day 37. I've read messages from some guys who noticed their dreams get different. Last week I have more vivid dreams and I have the feeling my sleep is a bit different, deeper, more intense. Don't know if related. Sex is lots better. I would think that without PMO the O would be faster, but in fact it's the opposite, like longer stamina, more self-control. Awesome stuff.
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Deeper and more restful sleep, more vivid and remembered dreams are definitely a sign of recovery. I've always seen this in my previous series. After the sleep reaches this stage, the improvement becomes more visible. The mood gets better.
I had reached this stage earlier in my previous series, but lately my sleep has been bad.15. I'm in the day. It still hasn't improved. I am waiting for deeper sleep and vivid dreams asap. You are on the right track and you are making progress. The brain will heal in sleep. Deep sleep and vivid dreaming indicate that REM sleep is of good quality. Do not lose this stage. Keep going my friend!
 
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dylank

Member
Resurrection said:
Deeper and more restful sleep, more vivid and remembered dreams are definitely a sign of recovery. I've always seen this in my previous series. After the sleep reaches this stage, the improvement becomes more visible. The mood gets better.
I had reached this stage earlier in my previous series, but lately my sleep has been bad.15. I'm in the day. It still hasn't improved. I am waiting for deeper sleep and vivid dreams asap. You are on the right track and you are making progress. The brain will heal in sleep. Deep sleep and vivid dreaming indicate that REM sleep is of good quality. Do not lose this stage. Keep going my friend!
Click to expand...
wow thanks for your post! Very informative, and looks like I'm on the right track. I think I'm lucky that my progress is fast and that I'm noticing these changes fast. Needed a post like this, because I'm having some alone time right now, so it's easy to be triggerd now. Holding on! Thanks!
 
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dylank

Member
Day 41. These days are a bit tougher.
I'm away in a hotel for work for a week, which is partly ok because of the possibility to have some alone time. Contrasted, lots of triggers are here. Both addictions creep up on me. Been able to resist and already halfway in this week.
Most important to me is when it gets difficult, I need to focus my brain around other, unrelated, stuff.
 
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dylank

Member
Day 46! Bamm.
So, still no porn! Right now, the habit of just watching has decreased a lot. So, it gets easier to deal with it, because it isn't on my brain all the time. Even thinking stuff like: what did it even bring me? Why is it even interesting? Not that I don't get aroused, but the triggers are more real-life now. So now I get aroused, and have sex a lot, which is great. Because of this rebooting stuff everything gets easier. Been doing lots of new stuff, like positions, acts and more. And because of less anxiety ( about PMO in my head like before) Im having more self confidence and I'm more verbally about what I like or like to do. Also, because of the greater comfort zone, I'm more relaxed when performing so I can focus more on her and the act and in that way everyone wins (except the porn distributors, but hey, they should get a real job!)

One thing about last week. Maybe less positive. Or is it? As I said, lots of alone time, and I got some triggering from within, and had some one sided multiple MO action. I was wondering what effect it would have, and besides making me more calm, warm and relaxed it didn't really have an effect on me sex-wise (besides the fact I lasted a bit longer the morning after when having sex). So maybe, every once in a while it isnt a problem, as long as I do it without the P from the PMO. Nevertheless, not wanting to have this as a habit of course, but trying to enjoy and don't feel bad about it as long as it is every once in a while maybe. For me, the full PMO is the problem. Definitely not the O. Probably not the M.

About addiction 2, last week was a bit harder but still managed to cold turkey that shit.

So guys, hope you are doing good, I guess I am.
 
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dylank

Member
48! cant believe this stuff. feels easy, even. I'm feeling the change. Sex is lots better and I think there is a bit of a hor onal change happening, like some wires in my brain are wiring differently. So for example, dreams are getting way more vivid and active. I'm a bit more tired in the evenings, I think it's because on PMO I was more calm/stable/flat. and now I'm more active and energetic during the day. Also, higher levels of lust are a positive but can give me some negative triggers too (I can't hump everything around you know)..
 
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