Masturbating without porn is not a "relapse."
Read this from our
Basics Of Rebooting page:
------------------------------------------
If addiction-related brain changes or sexual conditioning are underlying your symptoms, you need to reverse the process by giving your brain a well deserved time-out.
Rebooting is our term for recovering from porn addiction and associated symptoms, including erectile dysfunction. We call it rebooting so you can envision restoring your brain to its original factory settings. Obviously, you cannot go back in time to restore point, or erase all the data as you would when you wipe clean a computer?s hard drive. However, you can heal many of the brain changes that lead to your porn addiction. (See:
Does porn addiction cause irreversible damage to the brain?)
The quickest way to reboot is to give your brain a rest from artificial sexual stimulation?porn, porn fantasy, erotica, and for some - masturbation and orgasm. Most guys eliminate or drastically reduce orgasms during their reboot period. On the other hand, sensual contact with a real person can be beneficial, as long as you don't fantasize about porn. In fact, some guys engage in gentle intercourse, in which they avoid getting close to the edge or orgasming.
If porn use is the cause of your symptoms, you may wonder why it helps to eliminate masturbation and orgasm during the temporary rebooting period. The short answer is -"that's how most guys have done it." All suggestions for rebooting come from men who have successfully rebooted. Nearly all discovered that mixing in masturbation or orgasms slows, or in some cases, entirely derails, the rebooting process, especially if you have porn-induced ED.
To our surprise, very few men successfully recover from porn-induced ED while continuing a regular masturbation/orgasm schedule (see -
Porn & ED). The few who continue to have orgasms, and successfully recover from porn-induced ED, are men who didn't start early on Internet porn. Most are in their late 30's to early 50's, and have a significant other. This doesn't mean that you will never recover if you continue to masturbate, orgasm or relapse into porn. In fact, most guys sometimes "relapse" back into porn use during their reboot.
It's very confusing at first because the process is nonlinear, and each brain recovers differently. Some people have intermittent cravings and flatline periods. Some have their worst cravings in the first two weeks. Some feel good for a short time and then go into a more challenging period. Some feel horribly anxious. Some feel *less* anxious overall, but also have sluggish libido for weeks. Others don't find out their libido was recovered until they get with a real partner after several months.
Again: Some guys with ED can get away with orgasms, although they drastically reduce the frequency. Those men are almost always older men who did not start with Internet porn. They wired their sexuality to the real deal before diving into the Internet. Most have a significant other in the picture.
"To masturbate, or not to masturbate, that is the question"
As stated, we have only two "rules': 1) Stop using artificial sexual stimuli, and 2) Do what works for you. Many guys have discovered it is helpful to eliminate or drastically reduce masturbation/orgasm during a reboot. Possible reasons to drastically reduce or eliminate masturbation during a reboot:
1. If you have porn-induced ED, your brain is saying:
"I can't do this anymore". Understand that your urge to masturbate is not true libido - you are addicted to porn, or your sexuality is conditioned to pixels. If you need porn to masturbate, or have a partially erect penis when you do, you are not horny or in need of
"release". You are addicted and seeking a fix: a temporary dopamine high.
2.The
majority of men with porn-induced ED need to drastically reduce masturbation and orgasm. When you have a pathology, you usually need to do more than just eliminate the cause - in this case porn use. You don't generally break a leg by putting weight on it. However, once it's broken you have to cast it, use crutches and eliminate walking while you heal. Same goes for porn-induced ED. You don't have to wear a cast, but you need to give your brain time to heal, free of intense sexual stimulation.
Masturbation and porn use are tightly wired together. Like Pavlov's dog that salivated when it heard the bell, you will start drooling for porn when masturbating. Time is needed to weaken the neural connections intertwining wanking and watching.
Recovery may be easier without masturbation/orgasm. Remove masturbation/orgasm from the equation and most guys experience a sharp decline in sexual desire, we call the flatline. (See:
"HELP! I quit porn, but my potency, genital size, and libido are decreasing")
When you also eliminate orgasm/masturbation, not just porn, it seems to precipitate a more complete and deeper withdrawal, and thus healing.
Masturbation and orgasm strongly reactivate cravings to use porn. It has been surprising to witness that most men have an easier time eliminating masturbation than they do porn. For most guys with porn addiction, masturbation is simply not that interesting without porn, and they are amazed to discover that porn, not their libido, was driving their constant search for relief.
Caveat: All the above is based on the current feedback given to us by successful rebooters. It is subject to change.
Caveat 2: Some guys with porn-induced ED need to orgasm in order to jump-start their brains after a reboot or extended flatline