Doing things differently this time

[Qwertyxyz]

Day 12 PMO free

Good to get another day done. I’m feeling mentally fatigued today so I need to be careful. Self care really helps. I’m trying to look for things behind my recovery, things I distract from. There is a lot there. I should do something now, being active helps.

 

[Qwertyxyz]

Day 13 PMO free

Feeling alright, yesterday was one of those days when everyone wanted to talk to me and I just wanted to do my job, as an autistic person I hate this. I was pretty shaky after, it hard when you aren’t understood. I want to say I feel quite today and hopefully they will leave me alone.
It’s so painful and complex, socialising is normal and healthy and expected, and I wish I could be more fluent and had more to give. I often say to other autistics I can do my job or be social, but not both at the same time.

I have grown a lot socially in the last 4 years since my diagnosis and that is great. I’m much better socially but have been talking to my therapist about having generalised anxiety disorder (GAD). In regard to PMO recovery I really feel that I won’t get long term recovery unless I let people in, and this is very, very hard for me. But I kind of feel ready and will look for a coach or join PAA or some other group for porn recovery.

 

[Qwertyxyz]

Day 14 PMO free

Glad to get here (2 weeks).
It’s early days but I’m doing well I think. I hope when I get home I can build up more support. Happy to have the time up

 

[Qwertyxyz]

Day 15 PMO free

Hanging in there. I feel my energy is better today, I’ve been pretty busy mentally. There is a lot happening in my life right now and it will all go bad if I go back to hiding in PMO.

Good luck out there.

 

[Qwertyxyz]

Day 16 PMO free

I like my head being clear. I hate the brain fog when I’m deep in porn use. I feel capable of getting clean. I run a support group for people with autism, if I use it gets a lot harder and much more stressful. Life is much harder when I use.

 

[Qwertyxyz]

Still haven’t got this. It’s hard, I know what is affecting me. There is such an issue with my ex, she is not well and has our son. It’s pretty messy and I know it’s the emotional reason behind my constant relapses. It’s hard. I need to seek out more discussion about this, I might try PAA or a coach, I know I can do this but I can’t do this alone. My PMO use affects everything negatively, it’s not good.

 

[Qwertyxyz]

Day 6 PMO free

Doing alright, am planning to talk to people more about my recovery. I know that i keep things to myself too much. Social anxiety gets in the way of my getting true recovery. I need to let others in but feel like im getting better all the time.

Great to have some time up. I have a lot going on in life and being clean is definitely best

 

[Dangermouse]

I used to keep a lot to myself and tried to deal with so many other peoples problems that I forgot about my own well being, now I am struggling each day to better myself after falling victim to this fucked up shit. I have damaged my marriage and I am at a lower level, I am trying to rebuild myself and my marriage but getting clean and so far so good, problem is nothing every seem enough at the moment. It is a long road to recovery.

 

[Qwertyxyz]

Day 9 PMO free

It’s been great to get a week up but I feel myself weakening a bit. I need to keep pushing out of my comfort zone. At work and am very tired. I can do this

 

[Qwertyxyz]

Here again,
Lately it seems I can get maybe a week or two up and than I relapse, as much as forums help I think I need a coach to help me. I believe I can quit but I it’s not so much about self will and more about the right routine and resource.
PMO is costing me a lot and I need to keep fighting it. Have been pretty bad lately. I’m trying again now, even if I get a week up it’s a better week than what it would have been.