I want to be inspiration for you

[Berens]

Day 9
I am definitely going through some kind of crisis now. And it's not a bad thing as the only thing that we know about crisis is that it is going to happen no matter what and that we can't avoid it. It's a great opportunity to grow and take good decisions to change the life for a better. We can't allow the crisis to dominate us. We have to take control over the situation and push into the right direction. 

 

[Berens]

Day 9
Sometimes I just worry too much and look for short term solutions to the problems. Yes, i feel sexually frustrated but if I look for short term solutions what happens is that I end up relapsing. If i want to succeed i have to put everyday an effort and someday it will pay off. Hard work is cumulative and won?t go in vain. My life goal is to get married and have children. I want to have a successful marriage and want to have great relationship with my future children. PMO is great obstacle to achieve that.

 

[Berens]

Day 10
It was a really good day today, just having a breakfast in a coffee shop and taking a walk made my day. Optimism is the idea that what we do is worth the effort and that we are going to achieve what we want to achieve. Rebooting is going to bring happiness and everyday of rebooting is definitely worth it! I feel grateful for everyday without PMO.

 

[Berens]

Day 11
Boredom begins, brain is rebalancing itself. That's good, I am not going to spend my whole life stimulating my brain with worthless content. I have to live my life in a meaningful way and enjoy life.

 

[Berens]

Day 12
Rebooting is boring. This boredom is not going to last forever. I'll just focus on doing what i have to get done, despite feeling so bored. Even things that were always entertaining to me seem to be boring and i can't focus on them for more than 20 minutes. But that's okay. Actually that's were i want to be. If i am going to be possessed by the will to entertain and stimulate myself, i will always end up escalating to PMO.

 

[Berens]

Day 12
P is disgusting and it has got terrible consequences not only on us but on whole society and on children. P is so normalized in our society that we dont even recognise softcore P as P. Our generation doesnt even know what healthy sexuality looks like.

 

[Berens]

Day 14
I really can?t allow myself a relapse. I have met some girl and i would like to invite her on a date and move forward. It is a big step for me to move from PMO addiction to dating. It is really important for me and i am very motivated.

 

[Berens]

Day 15
How much of who we are is defined by a habit? Can we recognise how many things we do automatically on daily basis? If our life becomes so automatic that we feel helpless about having control over own our lifes, then we will want to escape from the routine. And P is an easy escape from automatic and uncontroled life. But we don?t have to escape from it but rather take control over it. It?s our lifes, who is going to have control over our lifes if not us? So, what can we do? First, we have to recognise the urges that we have for acting in an automatic way. For example if everyday in the morning I prepare a cappuccino, then I can recognise that I do it automatically and try something else this and next morning.

 

[Berens]

Day 15
I have seen accidentaly an image that was triggering. I have inmediately experienced a brainfog and my mindset has changed. I began to have sexual fantasies. It is almost like I got possessed and ceased to be myself. I have observed on myself how quickly i could lose control overmyself.

 

[Berens]

Day 16
I have to remind myself of how important it is to eat and sleep healthy. Those are really the basics. Yesterday i haven't eaten well and have gone to sleep little later. That already has altered how i feel today. I'll do some more sports, I'll go running today, even if it is just for 10 minutes. I am listening to audiobooks on scribd.com, which is cool because i am not only stimulating my imagination and learning new things but also i am engaging in some activity that helps to overcome boredom.

 

[Berens]

Day 16
I feel really good and grateful to be alive. Tomorrow is Saturday, I?ll go in the morning to see the sunrise and read a novel in a coffee shop. I can allow myself once a week a little pleasure of having a coffee and cake. Does things really matter when it comes to rebooting. PMO addictions superstimulates our brains and because of it we become blind to beauty. World around us is beautiful but we don?t see it. We see only stimulation and comfort. When we reboot, we don?t regain erections but the perception of reality is changing as well. Changing for better.

 

[Berens]

Day 17
Behind every great man there's a great woman. Women can be great inspiration and stimulation for us, to work hard towards meaningful goals, to create great art and build civilizations. But women in P? Those are vampires that are just taking our energy without giving anything back. We became addicted to exaggerated shapes of female body and to sexual fantasy. And people who create P are creating content to fit your deepest sexual fantasies to make you dependent on P. Our bodies take a lot of energy to produce semen. Semen that you lose every time you have an orgasm. P videos and images are not made for you to make you enjoy more your life. They are made to steal your attention. Pay attention on how many advertisements you see a young attractive woman, even when the product they sell has nothing to so with a women. Even on youtube thumbnails they place some attractive women only to make you click. How many decisions are we taking for ourselves and how many times we are just reacting because ?female body??

 

[Berens]

Day 18
Today i have been talking with a friend about pornography. We have been talking about negative consequences of pornography on relationship between men and women, on children and on us as individuals. Having such conversations is really helping to liberate oneself from P because we can take different point of view. Also because when you talk about it with someone, P topic is not something you are hiding but something you face with another person, so to speak. It would be definitely easier for me if i would have someone years ago that i could talk about my addiction, psychologist, therapist or some mentor i trust. If i could go back in time, probably i would contact some psychologist via email or by phone and tell about my PMO addiction.

 

[Berens]

Day 19
Monday...
Mondays are 1/7 part of our life. I feel grateful for Mondays. We take rest on weekends to start fresh on Monday. Lately i push myself more in work, to work more hours and to be more effective. I am overcoming some laziness. Also boredom that i have been writing about some days ago is not that problem anymore. Also optimism is a thing. I feel that all this effort in rebooting, in reading books, in taking care of myself, in journaling and in meeting new people is worth taking. It already is paying off as i am definitely doing better than i was doing months and years ago. But still great future is about to come.

 

[Berens]

Day 20
I have got a trigger in a dream, so i have woke up aroused. When we grow, we face crisis. Crisis a threshold between where we are now and next level. It is when we overcome crisis that we grow. Rebooting is experiencing a crisis on daily basis, and when we move forward despite the burden of rebooting, then we grow.

 

[Berens]

Day 21
Rebooting is an investment in a relationship. Quality of romantic relationship depends on how deeply we can connect with another person. When we reboot, we don?t only become more sensitive but we focus more on intimate connection. When we consume P, we perceive women as objects to achieve an orgasm with. I am single now, but I do rebooting not only for myself but for my future girlfriend/wife. And i am not talking only about sex aspects but about deep bonding and intimacy.

 

[Stiffy]

That is the right mindset to have and I 100% share those views with you. Love is what makes this life worth living in my opinion and I desire nothing moreso than that.

Great post and great reminder for myself. I?m glad that like-minded individuals such as yourself come here and share their thoughts and experiences. It makes a world of difference for me to come here and read everyone?s journal and update my own. So thank you. Congrats on 21 days, that?s awesome. I am looking forward to when I get to that point again. I?m about half way there.

 

[Berens]

Thank you Stiffy, i can?t agree more with you. Also to add to what you have said, the more effort we put in rebooting, more love we feel for ourselves. The more we reboot, more we can love others and feel worthy of receiving love.
Day 22
Tonight i had very interesting dream that i think is worth of sharing. Briefly, i was traveling in a train and there was a blonde woman that i have seen in P. She was seating in front of me and she was talking very loudly with other people. I have moved to another side of the train car so i could not see nor hear her. But later she moved to seat in front of me again. So i have engaged in conversation with her. I have asked her, that i know she is P actress and that if i can talk with her about something. I have seat closer to her and have told her that my life goal is to have a family and children. And my question was what are the characteristics of women like you so i can avoid women like you when dating. This is when my dream has ended. And i have realised something important because of having this dream. When we are addicted to P, we perceive P actresses and attractive women in general as someone that is suprior to us, we place them on a pedestal. They are having sex, we don?t, so they are better. And we feel lust for them that we can?t satisfy. But the truth is that when we work on being honest with ourselves, on gaining self-control, on knowing what we want from life, of our friendships and on what is really important and meaningful to us, then we are on such high pedestal that a P actress looks like an ant from our point of view. Why? Because she went the easy way for quick money and she has sold her possibility of loving and having a family. In my dream i have asked her who are you so i can avoid you as much as i can. If i would do that in real life, i can only imagine the shame that she would feel for herself.

 

[Berens]

Day 23
Tonight i had a wet dream, which is a good thing. On short term it is annoying because i feel more tired and aroused. But it is some kind of relief. Months ago i have bought Cupid?s poisoned arrow book by Marnia Robinson. I have finished reading it time ago but i still go back to it an read some of the chapters and highlighted parts. This books was definitely a good investment.

 

[TheGreenWizard]

Day 23
Tonight i had a wet dream, which is a good thing. On short term it is annoying because i feel more tired and aroused. But it is some kind of relief. Months ago i have bought Cupid?s poisoned arrow book by Marnia Robinson. I have finished reading it time ago but i still go back to it an read some of the chapters and highlighted parts. This books was definitely a good investment.

Congrats. Just a few more days and you are hitting 1 month which is pretty badass. Keep at it and stay strong. I've personally just started and it's been 10 days for me. It hasn't been easy but you definitely learn a lot about yourself with this process.