Exodus
- Thread starter MosesY
- Start date
J
J01
Guest
It is nice to hear from you again and to learn of your great job in the battle! Hope you can get a chance to pass along some insights you learned and to continue posting.
MosesY
Active Member
Thank you for the kind words. I am 167 days porn free now. I could not do this without help from a higher power. My higher power is the Biblical God. I am not quitting on my own, I have His help. I will receive $1000 tax refund on the 20th and then will be the true test wwhether I can resist the cam girls or not.
MosesY
Active Member
On Februaty 1 I looked at a little porn. I was not going to reset my counter because it wad such a small relapse but I decided to anyway so now I am 29 days free from porn. I have not spent any of my tax refund on porn. I feel pretty good today, no temptation to look at porn.
MosesY
Active Member
I am 35 days fee from porn now. I am enjoying life immensely. I say 35 days fee from porn but it is really more like 6 months. In the past 6 months I have looked at 2 little bits of porn, as opposed to looking at porn every night. This has made a tremendous difference in my dopamine levels and thus my enjoyment of life.
MosesY
Active Member
I am porn free for 63 days now. Yesterday was a good day, sat out in the garage with my roommate. We had cigars and some black velvet. The quarantine is getting too me. I am still working but not being able to get out and socialize on the weekends is a trigger for me. Right now the cam girls are not a temptation for me but I am concerned because I have a lot of money right now and it would be so easy to just spend $20. On the other hand I know the guilt that would follow, having to restart my counter, admitting my failure here, and I think I will just play with my Coleman lanterns instead.
joepanic
Respected Member
Hey MosesY
Cigars and Black Velvel what a great combination. Yes the quarenteen is getting to many people myself included. I should really call it self isolation I suppose as up in Canada we are alowed to go out as long as your not in a risk group where you need to spend 14 days at home (which we all did as we had to pull my daughter out of a highschool exchange program in Germany a few weeks ago) At the moment we are only leaving the house to get groceries and its usually only 1 of us and were not having any visitors. But we will make the best of it. Glad to see your doing well in your fight. I am currently I think at abluot day 115 or something after 35 years of either porn or chatrooms etc. I dont feel the pull for porn at all anymore and the chatroom still enters my mind but it is becoming less of an issue everyday as it seems to enter my mind less and less each day. Maybe you need to find some way to put your extra cash somewhere where it is locked away for 30 days or 90 days or something. Most banks offer some sort of bond which you could buy using your net banking They are usually a safehaven for investing dont cost anything to buy and its short term Might be a good idea to make some calls if that one of your worries. Once that worry is gone you can move forward oin other areas of growth or healing. Just a thought
Cheers
Post often it helps me it helps you
Cigars and Black Velvel what a great combination. Yes the quarenteen is getting to many people myself included. I should really call it self isolation I suppose as up in Canada we are alowed to go out as long as your not in a risk group where you need to spend 14 days at home (which we all did as we had to pull my daughter out of a highschool exchange program in Germany a few weeks ago) At the moment we are only leaving the house to get groceries and its usually only 1 of us and were not having any visitors. But we will make the best of it. Glad to see your doing well in your fight. I am currently I think at abluot day 115 or something after 35 years of either porn or chatrooms etc. I dont feel the pull for porn at all anymore and the chatroom still enters my mind but it is becoming less of an issue everyday as it seems to enter my mind less and less each day. Maybe you need to find some way to put your extra cash somewhere where it is locked away for 30 days or 90 days or something. Most banks offer some sort of bond which you could buy using your net banking They are usually a safehaven for investing dont cost anything to buy and its short term Might be a good idea to make some calls if that one of your worries. Once that worry is gone you can move forward oin other areas of growth or healing. Just a thought
Cheers
Post often it helps me it helps you
MosesY
Active Member
Freedom from porn for 69 days now. We are getting Fridays off with pay now so I have extra time at home alone. I have a very big book to read called "Things to Come" by J Dwight Pentecost. It will keep me occupied so I will not look at porn. I am going to buy a couple steaks today and tomorrow I make potato salad so my roommate and I will have a great dinner. In the past I would have spent all my money on cam girls and would not have been able to afford a good dinner.
joepanic
Respected Member
Nice going MosesY
I have felt doing things like that are so important It gives a great reason to be alive. Its amazing how porn could replace that and we forgot what a great pleasure life can be. Quite fankly I''m sure during our addictions we were telling other people the life we were supposidly living but were living a lie I know I did it many times Wanted people to think one thing about me .... That I was cool successfull hip etc but in reality I was a nobody well no more of that Itstime to kick back and live the good life 100%
cheers and enjoy the steak
Post often it helps me it helps you
I have felt doing things like that are so important It gives a great reason to be alive. Its amazing how porn could replace that and we forgot what a great pleasure life can be. Quite fankly I''m sure during our addictions we were telling other people the life we were supposidly living but were living a lie I know I did it many times Wanted people to think one thing about me .... That I was cool successfull hip etc but in reality I was a nobody well no more of that Itstime to kick back and live the good life 100%
cheers and enjoy the steak
Post often it helps me it helps you
MosesY
Active Member
Thank you for responding. I got my stimulus money yesterday, over a thousand dollars in the bank. I am buying a mini lathe with some of it but I still have a lot of money in the bank. We have an extra day off tomorrow with pay so the trick will be not to spend money on cam girls. I am 75 days free from porn now. I lost all my meds when vinegar leaked into my med drawer. I am working on replacing them now but it will probably be a couple days or sometime next week. A perfect storm; no meds, money in the bank, and lots of free time. If you pray, please say a prayer for me.
MosesY
Active Member
Thano you for the response. I am 81 day free from porn now. I am getting ready to go to work; no quarantine for me unfortunately. I get Fridays off with pay so only 4 day weeks. I bought a mini lathe with my stimulus money so hope to turn some wood this weekend. I hope to make some goulash this weekend which is a first for me, looking for recipes on cooks.com.
J
J01
Guest
If you make something with the lathe I hope you'll post a picture of it, just like you did with that lantern awhile back. Sorry, not much of a cook, can't help you out with the goulash! Keep moving forward!
MosesY
Active Member
Thanks for the response. I am 82 days free from porn now. Tonight I am drinking Black Velvet whiskey, staying up all night and setting fire to the internet. I have tomorrow off and can sleep tomorrow. Paid for sleeping is appealing to me. Hopefully I will avoid slipping over to the cam girls. Will let you know tomorrow when I wake up.
MosesY
Active Member
Today is my 90 days mark. I worked 9 hours yesterday and came home, drank a beer and a double of whiskey while chatting with a friend, ate dinner and went to bed at 7:30 pm. I woke up at 11:30 pm wide awake. I figured I would burn down the web for a few hours then go back to bed. Those wee hours of the morning would normally have been spent looking at porn but today there was no temptation. Possibly because I am old now, 52 years old, and not as virile. Possibly because I am no longer addicted to porn because I have been mostly off it now for six months. We have Fridays off now with pay due to COVID-19. I worked 47 hours in 4 days and today I get paid for doing my laundry; it is done, folded and put away at 6:43 am. I will go out and about with a mask today to the grocery store etc.