Pete McVries said:
I've been wanting to get into meditation for soooo long. I tried it several times whether it be meditation on my own or guided meditation with apps like "headspace". But I always felt like it didn't help me. There was no feeling of epiphany or like I had success. Perhaps, I was too results-orientated... If you don't mind and have the time, can you link me some helpful sources how to get started? Advice in general on meditation would be greatly appreciated!
Take care!
Of course! Headspace is a great place to start. Sometimes it's a matter of trying different things and seeing what works. Some people prefer a mantra meditation, others do better with mindfulness or zazen.
I'm not an expert, but I've been doing it every day for 8 years now, and it has--no exageration--changed my life. I would probably be dead if it wasn't for meditation.
But to your point about looking for something. That sounds like it could be what made it not work for you. There's no goal in meditation. It's not supposed to get you anywhere. It's just a practice of observing your thoughts without reacting to them. The reason you have an object of meditation, like your breath or a mantra or counting, is so you have something to "anchor" you that you can come back to when your mind wanders (which it will.)
It's not about not thinking or turning your thoughts off. That's not even possible. Instead, you try to observe whatever you're experiencing and thinking in the present moment. It's a subtle thing, but it comes down to the difference between getting caught up in a thought vs. noticing that a thought is just a thought.
One way I've heard it described is that each time you catch yourself wandering off into thoughts, that's like a "rep" in the gym. The more you practice, the easier it is to notice these things. You sit there, you have an itch. Does scratching the itch fix anything? what if you just sit there and feel what it's like to itch?
The main thing is consistency. It's better to do 5 minutes every day than to sit for a long time when you really "feel like it." It's about developing a practice, not just using it to chill out when you feel like you need it.
Anyway, here are some resources.
The simplest practice is counting to 10. And by simplest, I don't mean dumbed-down or basic. Many serious zen students start that way. Here's an outstanding article by Mark Manson on meditation. In it he describes the counting to 10 practice. He also argues why you should meditate:
https://markmanson.net/meditation
Other than that, Headspace might be worth another try. There's an outstanding book called Mindfulness in Plain English.
Ultimately,
How to Meditate: https://www.mindful.org/how-to-meditate/
20 tips for Beginnners: https://zenhabits.net/meditation-guide/
I hope this helps. I'll post more later when I have the time.
--MOM
