Day 16, no po, no mo (monk mode).
It’s been a long time since I wrote something that describes what I’m going through as I had always done since I started the reboot.
So many things happened that caused this…
The most important ones are the last relapse and the new job I got…
Since the last relapse that happened 2 weeks ago, I would just come into the forum and write how many porn and masturbation-free days I’m at and call it a day…
At that time i didn’t have anything to say really, but looking at it right now, i realized i had a dead libido, it’s scarce when i think about sex or porn or masturbation. It’s like my sexual feelings are gone or I’m numbed out
That’s a common thing all rebooters experience as they go through the reboot, we just have to get through it.
The second thing is the new job I got. I was without a job since the first reboot that lasted 100 days no po no mo, so probably 4 or 5 months of no Trabajo as they say…
And we all know what boredom and doing nothing can do to your reboot. Actually, the setback I had after 100 days was because of boredom and wasting time scrolling through youtube, and the rest is history…
But now after these 16 days of being porn free and putting my priorities in order and excluding porn from it, i feel pretty good. Even though I would come home tired and have a bit of stress that doesn't allow me to do much, so I would just get a proper meal and chat to family members and finally go to sleep like a baby…
One of the things that are improving right now is the quality of sleep I've been getting since I had the job. I still remember when I couldn't sleep till 3 or 4 am in the morning but now I would just put my head on the pillow and sleep immediately…
And about porn thoughts and urges I still get them but not as frequently as they used to be, even if i had them i would just ignore them. Even the beautiful women at my job don’t affect me with their beauty. I don’t know if this is a bad thing or a good thing, maybe like I said before it’s because I have a dead libido, so there you go…
I hope after this new start I will go porn free and never look back, the conditions my life is in right now will allow me to do that. I just have to stay busy and do meaningful things and eventually, everything would fall into place…
And not to forget the cherry on the top, the support I'm getting from all the great men in this awesome community,
@Blondie @Phineas 808 @cookiemonster @TryingHarder @FreedomFromTheStruggle_11 @particularly_respecting @downhillfromhere @Recovery Will Come . I thank you guys so much, your support is a grace.
Stay safe fellas, no way back.
Peace.
Ezel.