Striving to be better (journal)

Ended up doing MO. I felt compulsive af! I don't know if it's a relapse. I guess it is as I didn't felt in control and it didn't made me feel good at all. I didn't use P and no porn thoughts were in my mind as of doing the deed. I was just extremely horny. I should have been mindful that this can happen a few days ago because I could have seen this building in the past few days. And today (well tbh a few minutes ago as of writing this) as I was trying to sleep I just felt as if I was teasing myself all the time and ended up doing this. I feel bad now. I'll probably reset the timer.