Second try

[dwenjang1218]

Hi guys, I'm new here
I'm in my early 20's and I want to exterminate my porn addiction once and for all.
I recently found out that I've had this addiction for like 6 years
after stumbling upon some internet article regarding ill effects of porn.
before that, porn and masturbation was just a regular part of my life.

The truth is, I've tried going no porn recently, but it didn't last long.
I didn't have much knowledge about rebooting,
so I didn't realize sexual fantasies and still images counted as "porn".
That was a stupid attempt and only lasted about half a month.

But this time I know better thanks to this awesome site.
I'm writing this down and I will continue to report my progress
in order to strengthen my resolve and also to give and receive help to/from you guys.

This was Day 1 of my no PMO..
Thanks for reading, and I'll update soon.

 

[Gabe Deem]

What's Up Dwenjang1218,

It is great that you found that article that helped you see the truth of the ill effects of porn. It is one of Reboot Nations passions to raise awareness on this subject as there are still MANY people out there, along with children, who are blindly masturbating their way into addiction and they deserve the information we know.

I didn't have much knowledge about rebooting,
so I didn't realize sexual fantasies and still images counted as "porn".

Yea, just think about it like this... if it ain't real, no deal.

Hope the best for you on your reboot my man.  You will find a great support system here at RN!

much love

 

[dwenjang1218]

Thanks Gabe,
I really have a good feeling about my current attempt
thanks to all the information I can find on this site
and yourbrainonporn.com (which led me to this site)

Thanks for your hard work!

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 3:
The last two days were not bad. Fortunately, I was busy enough not to care about porn.
So far, the first day was the hardest due to the Chaser effect.. but I pulled through.

One thing I realized is that there are far too many sexual images around us in our everyday lives
that could jeopardize our rebooting process.
Our thoughts are so difficult to control when faced with these images and/or real life hot girls.

Just this morning I was tortured by semi-erotic lucid dreams,
which were probably derived from images I saw on 9gag the previous night.
Gotta be more careful.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 5:
I'm getting used to this. I don't have the urge to watch porn anymore.

However, the most difficult part is ignoring my morning wood.
I have lucid dreams every morning,
which often consists of images of girls.
On the bright side, I can kind of (barely) control my dreams so as to keep these girls from taking off their clothes.

Frankly speaking, I masturbated yesterday, but I kept it as dry as possible,
meaning I had no pornographic material or fantasies to masturbate to (Tried my hardest to not think about anything sexual).
Surprisingly, I had no problem finishing (although it was not the most satisfying O)

I hope this wasn't a mistake.
I'm not feeling any Chaser Effects today, which is a good sign.

 

[robust]

Day 5:
I'm getting used to this. I don't have the urge to watch porn anymore.

However, the most difficult part is ignoring my morning wood.
I have lucid dreams every morning,
which often consists of images of girls.
On the bright side, I can kind of (barely) control my dreams so as to keep these girls from taking off their clothes.

Frankly speaking, I masturbated yesterday, but I kept it as dry as possible,
meaning I had no pornographic material or fantasies to masturbate to (Tried my hardest to not think about anything sexual).
Surprisingly, I had no problem finishing (although it was not the most satisfying O)

I hope this wasn't a mistake.
I'm not feeling any Chaser Effects today, which is a good sign.

Don't force yourself not to think about that stuff. I won't work. Think about something positive instead (but make sure that this positive thought is actually stronger than the urge). You can't "ignore" the morning wood, which is truly the hardest part of the day. I've got the same "problem". But remember: A problem is only a problem, if you make it a problem. You might want to get up and take a cold shower or something (helps me a lot; but I'm used to that.. Beginning with cold showers is hard ).

 

[dwenjang1218]

Thanks for the advice, robust.
The cold shower thing is a brilliant idea!
I'll try it next time.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 7:
I'm glad I got through a week without porn.
I think I'm starting to see a few positive changes.

One significant change is that girls look twice as more attractive.
I find myself staring at girls' legs as they walk by, and I can barely control myself.

I've been noticing that free time is more readily available to me.
I use this time to read, go online, do some work, or sleep.

Speaking of sleep, I sleep less nowadays.
I wake up automatically after 6~7 hours of sleep for no apparent reason, still tired,
and I go back to sleep when this happens to get one more hour.
This phenomenon has been happening to me for the last 3 days in a row.
I don't know what my body is trying to tell me, but it seems like a good news.

There are claims that rebooting can boost your concentration,
but this I have yet to experience. I'm hoping it will happen on my second week.

 

[james23]

My story is really similar to yours, just wondering are you in a relationship?

 

[Partingglass]

I am having the same problem with sleeping man, hang in there. As far as masterbation, I don't think its bad, but if you do it everyday it will be harder to reboot, you have to let your body settle out and then you have to relearn women. You can do it!

 

[robust]

I am having the same problem with sleeping man, hang in there.

Me too. But I don't sleep 6 hours, rather 4.

 

[dwenjang1218]

My story is really similar to yours, just wondering are you in a relationship?

Nope. I'm single.
Which is why I figured I should masturbate at least once a few days,
unlike couples who can naturally let it out.

 

[dwenjang1218]

I am having the same problem with sleeping man, hang in there. As far as masterbation, I don't think its bad, but if you do it everyday it will be harder to reboot, you have to let your body settle out and then you have to relearn women. You can do it!

Thanks man. My plan exactly!

 

[dwenjang1218]

I am having the same problem with sleeping man, hang in there.

Me too. But I don't sleep 6 hours, rather 4.

That's really weird. I wonder why it's happening?
It's reassuring to find two more people that went through the same experience, though.
Looks like I'm on the right track.

 

[robust]

I am having the same problem with sleeping man, hang in there.

Me too. But I don't sleep 6 hours, rather 4.

That's really weird. I wonder why it's happening?
It's reassuring to find two more people that went through the same experience, though.
Looks like I'm on the right track.

Don't know why, man. Fact is: I'm not really tired. I just have to get up and keep busy. It seems as if my body is relaxed and had a good night's rest anyway.

 

[Gabe Deem]

@dwenjang1218

That's really weird. I wonder why it's happening?

Insomnia or lack of sleep is very common when quitting porn. It is probably due to increase in stress.

When you reboot, and deny your brain the pleasure it is used to getting. Your dopamine actually drops even further. Also, libido killing brain stress hormones CRF and norepinephrine increase. Not only that but addiction pathways in your brain become super sensitive for a period of time before they start to weaken. The branches (dendrites) on nerve cells processing addiction-related reward signals become "super spiny." This overgrowth of little nubs allows for more synaptic connections and greater excitation.

Your brain becomes super ancy to feed these pathways. I believe this increase in stress and heightened sensitivity to our addiction can keep us staring at the ceiling all night.

My advice is to print off some articles from YBOP and read them in bed before you go to sleep. The combination of learning and reading is great at giving you assurance and peace of mind. Knowing that this time of your life is only temporary and will pass as it has for others is very reassuring. It helped me so just throwing it out there. It should pass with time. Stay busy and active. Rest on the fact that our brains can change our entire lives.

Stay patient, stay strong.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 8:

No sweat.

Had the same wake-up phenomenon that I mentioned earlier.
But overall, I think I sleep better (fall asleep faster and deeper).
It could be because I don't watch porn anymore and I use that time to sleep.
I'll need more data to conclude whether I'm actually sleeping better.

I had no erotic dreams this morning, though, which was a first in one week.

 

[dwenjang1218]

@dwenjang1218

That's really weird. I wonder why it's happening?

Insomnia or lack of sleep is very common when quitting porn. It is probably due to increase in stress.

Okay that probably explains it.
The bright side is that I'm not feeling particularly tired overall (and robust seems to be feeling the same way).

In my case I had insomnia before rebooting,
But now it seems like I have no problem falling asleep.
I just have a problem waking up at the right time.

Anyways, thanks for the input!

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 12

Things are not going as smooth as I expected.
I still haven't watched a glance of porn
but my cravings are slowly coming back and fantasies are creeping into my head again during masturbation.

My theory is that the latter caused the former.

Fortunately, my decision-making faculty of the brains has significantly improved.
During the past week, there were times that I found myself hesitating just a click away from porn
and then convincing myself to stay away from it through logical reasoning.
Before reboot, I would have jerked away at the most inconvenient times, just because I "felt like it".

Regarding the problems I have been encountering in my sleep,
I still sleep pretty well. My sleep schedule has changed slightly,
so I can't say for sure whether it has improved, but it looks more or less the same.
Erotic lucid dreams appear less frequently (Whew),
but morning wood is still giving me troubles.

Nowadays, I keep wondering what it would be like rebooting while with a girlfriend.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 15:

I'm halfway there!

I feel like there's no stopping me from reaching this 1 month goal
as long as I keep my fantasies from exploding, especially during masturbation.
Keeping my thoughts contained is the most difficult part of the whole experience.

I was reading the posts on the forum and came across this today.
http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/how-do-i-know-when-im-back-to-normal
I noticed the bullet point "semen leakage", two words that seemed to describe my condition so accurately.

I never had the chance to share this with anyone in depth,
because no one seemed to be having this problem.
Does anyone else leak a small amount of semen an hour after ejaculation?
It's been happening to me for years now, and I had no idea it had anything to do with porn addiction.
It tells me that my porn addiction was more severe than I had thought.

Anyways, I'm really hoping I could reach flat-line soon.
I want to get it over with asap, but I'm guessing I have to wait at least another month for it to begin.
I thought this whole thing would be analogous to a 5km run, but boy was I wrong.
It's looking more like a whole marathon.
I feel like my current goal of 30 days won't get me anywhere.
I'm planning to extend my goal once I reach 30 days.