Second try

[dwenjang1218]

Day 17:

I think I may have found another problem.
I can safely say that P addiction is no more. I'm over that.
But I still get M cravings every other day.
I'm beginning to fear that my porn addiction has just switched its form
and is still lurking right behind me.

I think what is causing these M relapses (?) in my brain
is the fact that I've never slept with a girl before,
thus my brain naturally loads pornographic images- the only available sexual memory in store-
during M.

I went to YBOP FAQ section to research and came up with this page:
http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/what-about-fantasizing-during-reboot
There are split opinions about how far one can fantasize during reboot,
but in the end it all depends on the person.

Conclusion:
1. I need to determine whether this is a problem. I will stop masturbating for 5 days and see how my body responds.
2. I need to get sexual experience asap, so I can imagine real sex during masturbation
(in fact, getting a gf would eliminate my need for masturbation).

Some advice would be really appreciated guys!!!

 

[iwillprevail]

Hello V, I'm new to this site. I'm also trying to quit P and M.. I see that you are on your second try. As for your M problems, it could be that your body is responding to your diet. It could be a pro-inflammatory food that wants to trigger your relapse. If this is correct I recommend an an anti-inflammatory diet.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Hi iwillprevail!
I never thought about it in that way.
It could very well be something about my diet,
cuz recently I've been consuming a lot of peanuts, which are pro-inflammatory.
Thanks for the input!

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 18:

A quick update that I wanted to share:
I'm getting my driver's license in Korea right now
which consists of 3 stages: written test, vehicle handling test, and road test.

I took my handling test two days ago and I passed
but one thing I noted is that I wasn't all that nervous during the exam,
even though I was being watched by half a dozen people.
I was surprised to find that my legs were barely shaking (Shaking was a symptom for me pre-reboot).

I shrugged it off back then because it was an easy test, so I figured there was not much pressure.
However, today I went to practice driving with my mom
and I wasn't nervous at all. No mistakes either.
I wasn't afraid to get on the road in the first place,
despite my past trauma of an accident (small one) and miserably failing a road test (in Canada few years back).

So I may have confirmed the following benefits of rebooting: Increased confidence and concentration.
Patience is starting to pay off and my journey is becoming more exciting!
Thanks for reading!

 

[xc43]

Congratulations for you discovery of newfound confidence and concentration! Keep on the good fight.

X

 

[dwenjang1218]

xc45 thanks mate!

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 19:
A quick update:
It's day 19 of my no P, and day 2 of my no PMO.
Just yesterday I had cravings for masturbation, which I mercilessly ignored.
Today, I found that even during short craving moments, my penis was pretty dead.
The cravings themselves weren't smaller, but my penis was, which kinda surprised me and turned me off.
Even my morning wood was down to 60~70%

It could be because I didn't get enough sleep.
Or could it be a sign that I'm entering flat-line? ???

This is good news. I hope this continues tomorrow and the day after,
because the timing can't be better.

 

[robust]

I don't know what this is but I can tell you that I've made the same expierence.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 20 no Pron (Day 3 no PMO):
Just had my driving road test and I got my licence! ;D
I was a little bit nervous on the road, but I still had a lot of confidence.
To put it numerically, I would say I was 25% more confident than my pre-reboot confidence-level during exams.

My morning wood was 90~100%. Cravings were controllable, same as yesterday.
I don't think it's related to flat-lining,
I think it's just that my decision-making skills have improved.
As soon as I have that craving moment, I can kind of ignore it before my penis even starts to react.
I've realized that the battle is twice as hard when the Dragon of the South has awoken.

Still having a hard time taking my eyes off girls outside though.
It's about the only potential trigger for me to relapse into M nowadays,
Other than internet browsing accidents.

 

[robust]

Just had my driving road test and I got my licence! ;D

Got the licence on the day I turned 18. First thing I did was to get on the highway - pedal to the metal. 150 miles per hour. I would not recommend you to do this. Almost shat a brick. Never gonna forget this.

Have fun. 8)

 

[dwenjang1218]

Thanks mate,
I'm gonna have to keep this licence in the drawer until I can afford a car though lol.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 21 no P (Day 4 no PMO):

Just signed up for the April Challenge- thanks to robust for informing me.
I really doubt I can hold it for a whole month
but I might as well give myself another reason to avoid masturbation.

Cravings were milder today than usual.
I didn't have any erections today except for morning wood,
which is very strange. I didn't know my body was capable of being so... unaroused.

Can't stop checking out girls outside,
but no matter how long I stare at their bodies, I don't get an erection. At least not today. And barely yesterday.
If this phenomenon continues for two more days, I'll conclude it as a sign of flat-line.

On a brighter note, I found out that I can quit an anime marathon at will.
overall, I believe I have developed more control of some skills.
I will expand on it in a later date once I've confirmed them.

That's it for today. Have a great day guys!
Porn is bad, m'kay?

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 22 no P (Day 5 no PMO):

Last night and this morning was the worst since starting reboot.
Erotic thoughts came to my mind before I fell asleep, and along came the biggest urge I've had in years.
I was battling them all throughout morning till 7 o'clock.
Got a few winks of sleep till 11:00 and woke up with a huge erection.
I remember I almost O'd in my sexual dream, but I instinctively held back.
I wish I had O'd, because the feeling was so intense that I pre-cummed shortly after waking up.

I can feel so much pent up inside my balls.
They actually hurt a little when touched.
I will leave my penis alone for today because I still have to get past today to complete my 5-day no MO goal,
but I don't know about tomorrow.

I just wish I can have a wet dream REAL SOON

Gonna go out and take care of some business
Hopefully my mind will settle down once I'm outside.
Till next time,
Stay strong brothers!

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 23 no P (Day 6 no PMO):

---------------Progress:
I safely completed my mini-quest of no MO for 5 days. 
It's not much but everybody has their own pace, and mine is pretty slow lol
As the old Chinese proverb goes, "slowly but surely..."

It was much harder than I thought, especially since the night of 2 days ago
when I almost O'd in my dream.
Since then my urges were super high and I really didn't know I would make it.
Only this morning the urges started to simmer down,

So here's my new mini-quest: no-MO for 5 more days.     (<- face of determination)

------------Psychological changes:
Girls girls girls...
I already mentioned that girls look 5 times prettier after starting reboot,
but something else caught my mind today.
I used to only like skinny girls that look a certain way
but now I find a wide variety of girls attractive, even short girls, young girls, older women, business women, girls with short hair etc.
My spectrum range has widened 5-fold (but still not desperate enough for fat girls... not fat girls..).
I feel like a total pervert, but at the same time, I feel like this is how a real man should be feeling.
I hope I'm not leaving drool marks everywhere I go.

What a long post, I think I'll end it here.
Have a good one brothers!

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 24 no P (Day 7 no PMO):

Oh man this no masturbation thing is the real deal.
I was originally thinking quitting porn would be enough for me to get back to a healthy and enriched life.
And it probably is enough, but I'm curious to find out how far I can upgrade my life.
Through my recent experiment I found out that it's so hard for me to stop thinking about M.
I think I can live a healthy enough life with no P and frequent M,
but the fact that I'm so reliant on M gets me pissed off. Feels like I'm getting controlled by it.
And that's my motivation to change.

Nights are a bitch now. Haven't had a good sleep in 3 days.
Gabe was so right. The insomnia I had before does not measure up to today's.
I just lie there and try my hardest to sooth the anger of my dragon.
I hope to the gods I have a wet dream soon. My balls are aching for release.

I'm still psychologically stable, which is good news.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Day 25 no P (Day 8 no PMO):

Guess what. I didn't have any problems last night. NONE.
Not even a single image of woman, not even one tiny erection.
I just passed out.

literally passed out.. from drinking lol.
Was out with friends then I became a mess and friends brought me home.
Can't remember one quarter of the night.
Well I do remember the two super cute girls that I met at the bar,
one was the waitress and the other was in a group next to our table. Apparently the latter came from the US.

The US girl came and drank with us for a moment,
and I could strike up a conversation really easily.
She was sexy, petite and really cute, had put on slightly revealing clothes, a 9/10 kind of a girl (well it was dark, so I may be wrong).
But that's about it with that girl, the group left shortly after.
We then played darts with the waitress for shots.
Again, this girl was super cute, not the sexy type, but skinny, petite and pretty.
We won once and lost once, but overall it was a hell of a night.

Before reboot, if I had any kind of interaction with girls this pretty,
I would have went home and MO'd 100% of the time for a few days.
Today, however, there are no urges at all when I think about them.
Well I was dealing with a horrifying belly crunching hangover in the morning,
so I guess that kinda helped me forget the urges.

Anyways, have a good one guys!

 

[robust]

Before reboot, if I had any kind of interaction with girls this pretty,
I would have went home and MO'd 100% of the time for a few days.

Yeah, I know that. :

Glad to here that you're fine. And even more glad that you quit masturbation for a while.

 

[dwenjang1218]

Thanks robust, I think I'm starting to get the hang of it 
I might have a good shot at completing the April challenge!

 

[robust]

Thanks robust, I think I'm starting to get the hang of it 
I might have a good shot at completing the April May challenge!

Fixed that for you, Sir.

 

[dwenjang1218]

LOL sneaky!
That just made my day thanks lol