Day 6 on hard mode.
So far so good. I feel like im back on the right track again. Also, the other things that have changed for me are paying off and bring improvement with them.
Stopping Ritalin was something i always thought to be impossible. But, after a prolongued period without i can safely say that i CAN function without it at work.
I've been taking it since i was 16 and i don't know any better. The first few weeks were very difficult. But I feel that my brain is now used to living without it.
Ok, so my concentration isn't the best. But i am actually managing quite well. This has been a real good boost to my confidence and self worth.
Switching to a vegan diet has also brought me a lot (unexpectedly). Although i really REALLY miss cheese, i find that i have more energy, am less bloated and also starting to loose some weight.
And all that while i'm eating a lot more than before. The added energy does help with battling the addiction.
With the wife it is going very turbulent. Due to the confession and my change in approaching problems we're working through 16 years of issues. So there is a lot to discuss.
She's so sweet and understanding, but understandibly she sometimes is also very angry and/or depressed. This was to be expected and i am glad that lately I am finaly able to openly communicate with her.
This really helps to not let discussions escalate.
Right now my focus on battling and prevention wrt the addiction was not 100% yet. We had a huge fight about it, since she was the one that was trying to make sure I did not fall into my own traps.
So now im refocussed and fully committed. But sadly it took quite a toll on my wife. So that's my focus for now.
PMO prevention and marriage saving.
But, in all honesty I can say that im glad and happy to (finally) do it. It is WAY overdue and probably on the edge of too late. But it's happening.