brandon1984
Member
It's been over a month since my last edge and even longer when I actually sat and watched P and had a O. Lol, this is new territory. I don't believe i've ever been this far out before! I'm going to keep going too!!
I know I spoke about morning wood before, but it's almost like clockwork now. I'd probably say most days out of the week i'd wake up with morning wood. This was DEFINITELY not the case in the start of this cold turkey process. Especially when I'd have relapses, just prolongs the morning wood occurrences. I spoke to my wife again about sex on a walk yesterday. I told her whenever she's ready to have sex, i'm ready. It's a bold statement that I've never really been able to say to her in a long time. She replied that "she's good" and I said, i know i put you in that place and i'd like to slowly but surely get you to the mindset of wanting a healthy sex life. I've definitely done damage. I accept that and I have to give her as much time as needed. Now when's she's ovulating, i definitely have the green light, so i'm almost just waiting for that.
I still wake up every morning, drop to my knees and pray. I let Him know that we did all we can do, during this last ovulation cycle, and it's up to Him to allow my sperm to meet her egg basically lol. I wish this stuff was guaranteed to always work, but little did I know, it's not. My wife is only 31, still relatively young, so we'll see. I also pray that He erases those brain pathways i made from watching P and to bring my mind back to it's natural state, before ever watching P. I believe this is working.
Let's keep going!!
I know I spoke about morning wood before, but it's almost like clockwork now. I'd probably say most days out of the week i'd wake up with morning wood. This was DEFINITELY not the case in the start of this cold turkey process. Especially when I'd have relapses, just prolongs the morning wood occurrences. I spoke to my wife again about sex on a walk yesterday. I told her whenever she's ready to have sex, i'm ready. It's a bold statement that I've never really been able to say to her in a long time. She replied that "she's good" and I said, i know i put you in that place and i'd like to slowly but surely get you to the mindset of wanting a healthy sex life. I've definitely done damage. I accept that and I have to give her as much time as needed. Now when's she's ovulating, i definitely have the green light, so i'm almost just waiting for that.
I still wake up every morning, drop to my knees and pray. I let Him know that we did all we can do, during this last ovulation cycle, and it's up to Him to allow my sperm to meet her egg basically lol. I wish this stuff was guaranteed to always work, but little did I know, it's not. My wife is only 31, still relatively young, so we'll see. I also pray that He erases those brain pathways i made from watching P and to bring my mind back to it's natural state, before ever watching P. I believe this is working.
Let's keep going!!