Porn is not an option
- Thread starter Blondie
- Start date
What is it the Marines say, "Retreat, hell!" which came from a specific battle, like, Retreat? We just got here! Not giving ourselves the option of retreat (burning the boats) compels us to go forward- no matter what.
Blondie
Respected Member
I didn't know about story Phineas. Thank you! I found a fascinating article about it here https://www.legion.org/stories/othe...tered World War I,French army at Belleau Wood.
Let's keep pushing on brothers!
Let's keep pushing on brothers!
Blondie
Respected Member
Day 245
Day 8 of no O
Today marks my second full week of no coffee, not even decaf. I would say only in the last three days did I feel back to somewhat "normal" again. I don't miss those damn random tired spells that's for sure! It feels good to be here, though I must admit that herbal tea still isn't as sexy as my coffee in the morning. I think I will experiment this coming weekend with two espresso shots and see what that does to me. If I don't have a heart attack or don't have withdrawal symptoms for the next three days afterwards, I will probably just do that as my new coffee habit. But, we shall see.
I'm really excited about my decision of not orgasming during sex and I feel this is the last missing piece of my recovery over these last 8 months. Although it is true everything is getting better, I just want to speed the process along. I'm still missing that raw sexual energy I experienced over my long reboot years ago and I want to get back there as soon as possible. I remember one summer day in particular about 14 months into my reboot when I literally felt my sexuality just completely turn on, like someone hit a switch or something, it was amazing! I still remember that day vividly, I was interacting with the female customers like I always did, and suddenly something just turned on down there, and I don't necessarily mean I got a hard on. No it was something better, it was just sheer sexual energy, and the pure enjoyment of interacting and being in the presence of the opposite sex. It was also at this time I could see my girl randomly walk to the bathroom, either clothed or unclothed, and get a hard on without even thinking about it, damn that was great!
This is what I aim for ladies and gentlemen, and this is what I'm after. I'm not talking about lusting here, nor about sexualizing everything I see, no no, that's for the porn watchers, I've been there, done that. No, what I'm talking about is a feeling deep in your loins, and definitely not your dick, something you can never feel watching porn on a lonely screen. I talking about the energy between a man and woman. This feeling is almost holy, almost spiritual, and it's worth every of bit time and struggle to get there.
I'm here to tell you I've seen the light once, if only partially, and I will see it again.
Day 8 of no O
Today marks my second full week of no coffee, not even decaf. I would say only in the last three days did I feel back to somewhat "normal" again. I don't miss those damn random tired spells that's for sure! It feels good to be here, though I must admit that herbal tea still isn't as sexy as my coffee in the morning. I think I will experiment this coming weekend with two espresso shots and see what that does to me. If I don't have a heart attack or don't have withdrawal symptoms for the next three days afterwards, I will probably just do that as my new coffee habit. But, we shall see.
I'm really excited about my decision of not orgasming during sex and I feel this is the last missing piece of my recovery over these last 8 months. Although it is true everything is getting better, I just want to speed the process along. I'm still missing that raw sexual energy I experienced over my long reboot years ago and I want to get back there as soon as possible. I remember one summer day in particular about 14 months into my reboot when I literally felt my sexuality just completely turn on, like someone hit a switch or something, it was amazing! I still remember that day vividly, I was interacting with the female customers like I always did, and suddenly something just turned on down there, and I don't necessarily mean I got a hard on. No it was something better, it was just sheer sexual energy, and the pure enjoyment of interacting and being in the presence of the opposite sex. It was also at this time I could see my girl randomly walk to the bathroom, either clothed or unclothed, and get a hard on without even thinking about it, damn that was great!
This is what I aim for ladies and gentlemen, and this is what I'm after. I'm not talking about lusting here, nor about sexualizing everything I see, no no, that's for the porn watchers, I've been there, done that. No, what I'm talking about is a feeling deep in your loins, and definitely not your dick, something you can never feel watching porn on a lonely screen. I talking about the energy between a man and woman. This feeling is almost holy, almost spiritual, and it's worth every of bit time and struggle to get there.
I'm here to tell you I've seen the light once, if only partially, and I will see it again.
Escapeandnevercomeback
Respected Member
Yes, amazing streak, man! God damn, almost 250! If this ain't inspiration right here, then nothing is. That's right, be tired of this bullshit, get mad, say fuck this, I don't want to live this life anymore and then accept that it is going to involve hard work, nobody wins the championship with 5 hours of training, we have to invest thousands of hours but who cares if it's hard, this leads to something, contant relapsing leads to nothing. Peace
Blondie
Respected Member
Day 247
Day 10 of no O
Thanks @Escapeandnevercomeback and @Ezel
This definitely is my mindset, although it was not for much of my life. The former has shown me life can get better if you put in the hard work, the latter, only sadness and despair.
At the end of the day, I would rather feel like shit after giving it my best, than cry knowing I didn't even try.
Best brothers and sisters!
Day 10 of no O
Thanks @Escapeandnevercomeback and @Ezel
This definitely is my mindset, although it was not for much of my life. The former has shown me life can get better if you put in the hard work, the latter, only sadness and despair.
At the end of the day, I would rather feel like shit after giving it my best, than cry knowing I didn't even try.
Best brothers and sisters!
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Amazing progress going 10 days without O and locked in for 250 days without porn
Keep on killing it brother!
Keep on killing it brother!
Amen to this too
Blondie
Respected Member
Roll the Dice by Charles Bukowski
if you’re going to try, go all the
way.
otherwise, don’t even start.
if you’re going to try, go all the
way. this could mean losing girlfriends,
wives, relatives, jobs and
maybe your mind.
go all the way.
it could mean not eating for 3
or 4 days.
it could mean freezing on a
park bench.
it could mean jail,
it could mean derision,
mockery,
isolation.
isolation is the gift, all the others are a test of your
endurance, of
how much you really want to
do it.
and you’ll do it
despite rejection and the
worst odds
and it will be better than
anything else
you can imagine.
if you’re going to try,
go all the way.
there is no other feeling like
that.
you will be alone with the gods
and the nights will flame with fire.
do it, do it, do it.
do it.
all the way
all the way.
you will ride life straight
to perfect laughter,
it’s the only good fight
there is.
if you’re going to try, go all the
way.
otherwise, don’t even start.
if you’re going to try, go all the
way. this could mean losing girlfriends,
wives, relatives, jobs and
maybe your mind.
go all the way.
it could mean not eating for 3
or 4 days.
it could mean freezing on a
park bench.
it could mean jail,
it could mean derision,
mockery,
isolation.
isolation is the gift, all the others are a test of your
endurance, of
how much you really want to
do it.
and you’ll do it
despite rejection and the
worst odds
and it will be better than
anything else
you can imagine.
if you’re going to try,
go all the way.
there is no other feeling like
that.
you will be alone with the gods
and the nights will flame with fire.
do it, do it, do it.
do it.
all the way
all the way.
you will ride life straight
to perfect laughter,
it’s the only good fight
there is.
TryingHarder
Well-Known Member
That quote is right on, Blondie. It's my new signature!
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Great poem Blondie!
Definitely agree with the sentiment
Bukowski really lived it too - dedicated himself to writing while doing work he hated to make ends meet
He was in his 50s before he had any real success
Great message for all of us here to keep focusing on what's important and we'll get there in the end
Btw Bukowski's editor, John Martin, changed many of his poems, and popular opinion seems to be that Martin's edits were not good (he smoothed over idiosyncrasies and removed vulgarities etc., but that's kinda what Bukowski's about)
Edits to roll the dice are more minor than other poems, but for completeness I copied the unedited version below in spoiler tags
Maybe one point relevant to us here is the reference to "alcoholism" halfway down
Bukowski's original is also darker with the reference to hell at the end
(Sorry had a bit a Bukowski phase a few years ago where I went deep into this stuff
)
Keep on doing it all the way Blondie and inspiring the community!
Definitely agree with the sentiment
Bukowski really lived it too - dedicated himself to writing while doing work he hated to make ends meet
He was in his 50s before he had any real success
Great message for all of us here to keep focusing on what's important and we'll get there in the end
Btw Bukowski's editor, John Martin, changed many of his poems, and popular opinion seems to be that Martin's edits were not good (he smoothed over idiosyncrasies and removed vulgarities etc., but that's kinda what Bukowski's about)
Edits to roll the dice are more minor than other poems, but for completeness I copied the unedited version below in spoiler tags
Maybe one point relevant to us here is the reference to "alcoholism" halfway down
Bukowski's original is also darker with the reference to hell at the end
(Sorry had a bit a Bukowski phase a few years ago where I went deep into this stuff
)Keep on doing it all the way Blondie and inspiring the community!
if you're going to try it, go all the
way.
otherwise, don't get into it.
if you're going to try it, go all the
way.
this could mean losing girlfriends,
wives, relatives, jobs and
maybe your mind.
go all the way.
it could mean not eating for 3 or
4 days.
it could mean freezing on a
park bench.
it could mean jail, alcoholism.
it could mean derision,
mockery,
isolation.
the isolation is the gift,
all the other is a test of your
guts,
how much you really want to
do it.
and you'll do it
against total rejection and the
highest of odds
but it will be better than doing
anything else
you can think of.
if you're going to try it,
go all the way.
there is no other feeling like
it.
you will be alone with the gods
and the nights will flame with
fire.
do it, do it, do it.
do it.
all the way
all the way.
you will ride death straight to
hell,
your perfect laughter,
the only good fight
now.
Source: https://www.poemhunter.com/poem/roll-the-dice-by-charles-bukowskifrom-the-computer-printout/
way.
otherwise, don't get into it.
if you're going to try it, go all the
way.
this could mean losing girlfriends,
wives, relatives, jobs and
maybe your mind.
go all the way.
it could mean not eating for 3 or
4 days.
it could mean freezing on a
park bench.
it could mean jail, alcoholism.
it could mean derision,
mockery,
isolation.
the isolation is the gift,
all the other is a test of your
guts,
how much you really want to
do it.
and you'll do it
against total rejection and the
highest of odds
but it will be better than doing
anything else
you can think of.
if you're going to try it,
go all the way.
there is no other feeling like
it.
you will be alone with the gods
and the nights will flame with
fire.
do it, do it, do it.
do it.
all the way
all the way.
you will ride death straight to
hell,
your perfect laughter,
the only good fight
now.
Source: https://www.poemhunter.com/poem/roll-the-dice-by-charles-bukowskifrom-the-computer-printout/
Blondie
Respected Member
Day 248
Day 11 of no O
@Ezel Thanks man, your encouragement is always a pleasure to read.
@particularly_respecting, thank you for the real version of the poem! That makes a good poem even better. I will definitely read more of Bukowski. Why would they fuck up something so cool and real?
@TryingHarder I'm glad you like that quote. It also rings true for me. The more I started to hate my bullshit years ago and all the excuses I was making, the better my life started to be.
Day 11 of no O
@Ezel Thanks man, your encouragement is always a pleasure to read.
@particularly_respecting, thank you for the real version of the poem! That makes a good poem even better. I will definitely read more of Bukowski. Why would they fuck up something so cool and real?
@TryingHarder I'm glad you like that quote. It also rings true for me. The more I started to hate my bullshit years ago and all the excuses I was making, the better my life started to be.
Blondie
Respected Member
Day 249
Day 12 of no O
I almost blew it today with my no orgasm rule. The lady and I were fooling around for a moment this morning and I almost let it go - thankfully she cared about my goal more than I did and reminded me of my vow of chastity.
I did release a little a pre-cum but no orgasm so I'm going to call myself good. Damn I feel like a teenager again!
Going twelve days so far has really helped me regain some sexual vitality to my life and I don't want to release that at the moment. It's been interesting to start this so far into my reboot unlike other times when I had been looking at porn or had just relapsed. At twelve days I feel like I felt at a month last time I did this - a ragging stallion amongst the mares!
If you're questioning if staying away from orgasms would help your recovery, I would suggest it will help tremendously, although porn obviously is our main problem.
Best.
Day 12 of no O
I almost blew it today with my no orgasm rule. The lady and I were fooling around for a moment this morning and I almost let it go - thankfully she cared about my goal more than I did and reminded me of my vow of chastity.
I did release a little a pre-cum but no orgasm so I'm going to call myself good. Damn I feel like a teenager again!Going twelve days so far has really helped me regain some sexual vitality to my life and I don't want to release that at the moment. It's been interesting to start this so far into my reboot unlike other times when I had been looking at porn or had just relapsed. At twelve days I feel like I felt at a month last time I did this - a ragging stallion amongst the mares!
If you're questioning if staying away from orgasms would help your recovery, I would suggest it will help tremendously, although porn obviously is our main problem.
Best.
Last edited:
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
I'm late to this, but truly amazing job in reaching 250 days!!! You are an inspiration to all of us here, I'm so goddamn happy seeing you are pushing through all of this
Couple questions for you my man:
1) How are your erections now vs. pre-reboot? Around what day did you notice improvements?
2) If you had to name 1-2 things, what are the biggest ways the reboot has helped you (aside from PIED)?
3) What's next for Blondie, on a personal note (setting aside P)?
AMAZING job again. Wishing you the best my guy
Couple questions for you my man:
1) How are your erections now vs. pre-reboot? Around what day did you notice improvements?
2) If you had to name 1-2 things, what are the biggest ways the reboot has helped you (aside from PIED)?
3) What's next for Blondie, on a personal note (setting aside P)?
AMAZING job again. Wishing you the best my guy
particularly_respecting
Active Member
One day away from the big 250 - inspirational!
Blondie
Respected Member
Those are great questions.
1. My erections are considerably better after eight months being porn free. As far as when I started to notice, maybe around four months. I would recommend not orgasming as much as possible. I'm on day twelve of that and it has alreadly been tremendously helpful in that department!
2. One great thing is just a general sense of happiness with myself in knowing I'm not doing something I hate doing. When you've told yourself you're going to quit something for a thousand times but yet you're back at it the next day, that just kills any sort of true confidence in yourself. Secondly, women are fantastic, always have been for me, but even more now. They're all beautiful even if I'm not necessarily "attracted" to them and I just love to talk with them more and see them as people first, and not just bodies. In a way, they are more sexual but not sexualized, if that makes sense.
3. lastly, Not looking at porn gives you the extra time on your hands to accomplish your goals. I'm back in school studying a passion of mine and this summer I'll be achieving something I've been wanting to do for ten years now.
Porn doesn't got shit on any of these benefits.
Best First Step!
1. My erections are considerably better after eight months being porn free. As far as when I started to notice, maybe around four months. I would recommend not orgasming as much as possible. I'm on day twelve of that and it has alreadly been tremendously helpful in that department!
2. One great thing is just a general sense of happiness with myself in knowing I'm not doing something I hate doing. When you've told yourself you're going to quit something for a thousand times but yet you're back at it the next day, that just kills any sort of true confidence in yourself. Secondly, women are fantastic, always have been for me, but even more now. They're all beautiful even if I'm not necessarily "attracted" to them and I just love to talk with them more and see them as people first, and not just bodies. In a way, they are more sexual but not sexualized, if that makes sense.
3. lastly, Not looking at porn gives you the extra time on your hands to accomplish your goals. I'm back in school studying a passion of mine and this summer I'll be achieving something I've been wanting to do for ten years now.
Porn doesn't got shit on any of these benefits.
Best First Step!
Ezel
Respected Member
Blondie your whole journey is outstanding, i don't know about the no orgasm thing, but I will choose to orgasm with my woman over porn any day of the week...
I'm always fascinated by your goals, for us starters we always want the same goals ( getting our sensetivity back down there, talk to a woman without stuttering...). But man your goals are on a different level...
I would like very much if you can elaborate more on the no orgasm rule...
Why is that? Is it like dopamine detox, where you don't get any joy and dopamine from any activity you do??
I'm always fascinated by your goals, for us starters we always want the same goals ( getting our sensetivity back down there, talk to a woman without stuttering...). But man your goals are on a different level...
I would like very much if you can elaborate more on the no orgasm rule...
Why is that? Is it like dopamine detox, where you don't get any joy and dopamine from any activity you do??