particularly_respecting
Active Member
Thank you also @viking1234 - we got this! 
Pride and joy
- Thread starter particularly_respecting
- Start date
Blondie
Respected Member
Wife came back early from her work
Previously I might've been caught out, scrambling to close tabs
But instead the dishes were washed, some housework was done, and I was getting on with my work
Felt good
Dude, so happy for you! You did it, what an accomplishment.
I know the feeling! Isn't great, to have people walk in unexpectedly into your room, and never feel any anxiety or panic that they might see you acting like a bloody wanker? That feeling alone is worth any hard day's withdrawals.
Proud of you! Enjoy the hell out of that new monitor!
Previously I might've been caught out, scrambling to close tabs
But instead the dishes were washed, some housework was done, and I was getting on with my work
Felt good
Dude, so happy for you! You did it, what an accomplishment.
I know the feeling! Isn't great, to have people walk in unexpectedly into your room, and never feel any anxiety or panic that they might see you acting like a bloody wanker? That feeling alone is worth any hard day's withdrawals.
Proud of you! Enjoy the hell out of that new monitor!
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 31 of not using porn
Thank you for the support @Blondie and @Onmyway19!
100% agree Blondie - feels great to see my wife using my phone or laptop and not worry there's something bad on it
Or like you said not worrying about being caught all the time
We talk a lot about PIED etc., which is true and it causes tremendous pain
But also the integrity you feel from just doing exactly what you told people you do is an underrated part of recovery imo
Another good day with strong focus on work today
Wife going away tomorrow so it will be a tough couple of days now
Gameplan (same as last time):
- Keep screentime down as much as possible
- Get outside/exercise
- Keep guitar near and pick it up if I feel urges
- Speak to wife on the phone at night
Stay strong brothers - I'm rooting for all of you!
Thank you for the support @Blondie and @Onmyway19!
100% agree Blondie - feels great to see my wife using my phone or laptop and not worry there's something bad on it
Or like you said not worrying about being caught all the time
We talk a lot about PIED etc., which is true and it causes tremendous pain
But also the integrity you feel from just doing exactly what you told people you do is an underrated part of recovery imo
Another good day with strong focus on work today
Wife going away tomorrow so it will be a tough couple of days now
Gameplan (same as last time):
- Keep screentime down as much as possible
- Get outside/exercise
- Keep guitar near and pick it up if I feel urges
- Speak to wife on the phone at night
Stay strong brothers - I'm rooting for all of you!
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 32 of not using porn
Good day today
Not much urges - a bit, but not much
I think it's because I'm tired from being up late working last night
Just got off the phone with my wife
Gonna try and get an early night tonight
Wife is also away tomorrow but just gonna stick to the gameplan and ride it out
Stay strong brothers - always a big inspiration for me to read everyone's journals!
Good day today
Not much urges - a bit, but not much
I think it's because I'm tired from being up late working last night
Just got off the phone with my wife
Gonna try and get an early night tonight
Wife is also away tomorrow but just gonna stick to the gameplan and ride it out
Stay strong brothers - always a big inspiration for me to read everyone's journals!
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 33 of not using porn
Mostly a good day today
Wasn't quite as focused on work as I could have been
But I cleared out a lot of small tasks that built up, so overall pretty happy
Some strong urges but I kept them at bay
Trying to keep rebooting at the forefront of my mind by:
- listening to anti-porn podcasts
- posting here daily
- keeping quitzilla tracker on home screen of phone
Seems to be working so far
Wife back tomorrow so should get easier then
On to day 34
Mostly a good day today
Wasn't quite as focused on work as I could have been
But I cleared out a lot of small tasks that built up, so overall pretty happy
Some strong urges but I kept them at bay
Trying to keep rebooting at the forefront of my mind by:
- listening to anti-porn podcasts
- posting here daily
- keeping quitzilla tracker on home screen of phone
Seems to be working so far
Wife back tomorrow so should get easier then
On to day 34
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 34 of not using porn
Okay day today
Fairly good day with work
No strong urges - I guess my wife being back helped
Trying to think about 90 days porn-free
Really want to get there but seems far away
Currently aiming for sixty days as an inbetween step
Then it will just be one month
Stay strong brothers - I'm rooting for you all!
Okay day today
Fairly good day with work
No strong urges - I guess my wife being back helped
Trying to think about 90 days porn-free
Really want to get there but seems far away
Currently aiming for sixty days as an inbetween step
Then it will just be one month
Stay strong brothers - I'm rooting for you all!
Good strategy! Whatever will help you to break it down into more manageable goals can work. For an example, you're already 1/3 of the way there!
Jswizzle
Active Member
Thank you for your kindness and support brother! Lift your chin up. A wise man once told me, "don't count the days, make the days count." In my opinion, you're doing that dudeDay 34 of not using porn
Okay day today
Fairly good day with work
No strong urges - I guess my wife being back helped
Trying to think about 90 days porn-free
Really want to get there but seems far away
Currently aiming for sixty days as an inbetween step
Then it will just be one month
Stay strong brothers - I'm rooting for you all!
. You will get there 24 hours at a time. 
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 35 of not using porn
Thank you @Blondie, @Phineas 808, and @Jswizzle!
Feel like I got some support from the all stars of the rn forum - inspirational seeing the collective time free from porn you guys have got
Always an inspiration to see Bruce Lee too - a true legend who showed the world what hard work and focus can do
Good day today
Strong MW and serious urges in the morning but got through it
Distracted at work but more on side projects/admin than "true procrastination"
(haven't been on reddit for 7 weeks and youtube for maybe 3 weeks? Honestly can't remember)
60 days - so 25 left
Just over 3 weeks
I can do this
Thank you @Blondie, @Phineas 808, and @Jswizzle!
Feel like I got some support from the all stars of the rn forum - inspirational seeing the collective time free from porn you guys have got
Always an inspiration to see Bruce Lee too - a true legend who showed the world what hard work and focus can do
Good day today
Strong MW and serious urges in the morning but got through it
Distracted at work but more on side projects/admin than "true procrastination"
(haven't been on reddit for 7 weeks and youtube for maybe 3 weeks? Honestly can't remember)
60 days - so 25 left
Just over 3 weeks
I can do this
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 36 free from porn
Good day today - my wife was at home which always makes things easier
Good focus on work too
Here is another quote from Dopamine Nation by Anna Lembke
A reminder to myself and any guys that are struggling with withdrawals
(context: when the brain is consistently flooded with dopamine, it becomes desensitized to it
as a result, the pleasure-pain balance tilts toward pain)
Seems like there is hope for us yet. Stay strong brothers!
Good day today - my wife was at home which always makes things easier
Good focus on work too
Here is another quote from Dopamine Nation by Anna Lembke
A reminder to myself and any guys that are struggling with withdrawals
(context: when the brain is consistently flooded with dopamine, it becomes desensitized to it
as a result, the pleasure-pain balance tilts toward pain)
Seems like there is hope for us yet. Stay strong brothers!
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 37 of not using porn
Good day today
Out all day with family so no time for urges
Got some important things done and was reminded of the importance of human connections
It's late here so I am keeping it short today and going to bed
Just wanted to report in on another porn-free day
Stay strong brothers - I hope you are all doing well in your own battles
Good day today
Out all day with family so no time for urges
Got some important things done and was reminded of the importance of human connections
It's late here so I am keeping it short today and going to bed
Just wanted to report in on another porn-free day
Stay strong brothers - I hope you are all doing well in your own battles
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 38 of not using porn
Okay day today
Slept in after a late night last night then was doing other things while working so I didn't get as much done as I hoped
But wasn't procrastinating
More like setting something up that is important and will help me long term
So overall not bad
Wife is away atm but back tomorrow
She randomly sent me a selfie
The selfie was nothing special - but I got an overwhelming feeling of how attractive she is and how lucky I am to be married to her
Very difficult to explain. Felt weird and emotional - like almost about to cry - just over a random selfie
Maybe I was just tired or it was some strange random thing that happened
Or maybe it really was some kind of feelings coming back after numbing myself for so long with porn
Like how @Blondie wrote in his journal about enjoying music
Tomorrow it will be just 3 weeks until I get to 60 days
Seems tough but I guess that's more manageable
Stay strong brothers and keep writing in your journals - always an inspiration to read stories from others going through similar struggles
Okay day today
Slept in after a late night last night then was doing other things while working so I didn't get as much done as I hoped
But wasn't procrastinating
More like setting something up that is important and will help me long term
So overall not bad
Wife is away atm but back tomorrow
She randomly sent me a selfie
The selfie was nothing special - but I got an overwhelming feeling of how attractive she is and how lucky I am to be married to her
Very difficult to explain. Felt weird and emotional - like almost about to cry - just over a random selfie
Maybe I was just tired or it was some strange random thing that happened
Or maybe it really was some kind of feelings coming back after numbing myself for so long with porn
Like how @Blondie wrote in his journal about enjoying music
Tomorrow it will be just 3 weeks until I get to 60 days
Seems tough but I guess that's more manageable
Stay strong brothers and keep writing in your journals - always an inspiration to read stories from others going through similar struggles
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 39 of not using porn
Another day of being distracted at work
Still no reddit or youtube
Instead, the kind of stuff I could tell myself is useful
But really it was more on the side of messing around today
Need to work more on focus
Strong urges in the morning but powered through it
Then wife came back, which always makes things easier
Thank you for all support brothers - it means a lot
I hope you are all doing well in your own battles too. I'm rooting for you all!
Another day of being distracted at work
Still no reddit or youtube
Instead, the kind of stuff I could tell myself is useful
But really it was more on the side of messing around today
Need to work more on focus
Strong urges in the morning but powered through it
Then wife came back, which always makes things easier
Thank you for all support brothers - it means a lot
I hope you are all doing well in your own battles too. I'm rooting for you all!
particularly_respecting
Active Member
Day 40 of not using porn
Somewhat better day today
Out in the morning so no time for urges then
At home working in the afternoon - no real urges
Not much to say today
Feel like I've got through some initial rough patches and ups and downs
Now it is a more a war of attrition than a fierce battle - my willpower vs. the addiction
Which will break first? The addiction I hope
Stay strong brothers - I'm rooting for you all
Somewhat better day today
Out in the morning so no time for urges then
At home working in the afternoon - no real urges
Not much to say today
Feel like I've got through some initial rough patches and ups and downs
Now it is a more a war of attrition than a fierce battle - my willpower vs. the addiction
Which will break first? The addiction I hope
Stay strong brothers - I'm rooting for you all
particularly_respecting
Active Member
41 days of not using porn
Thank you @Blondie!
Yes my sights are set on getting to 45 days now - halfway to 90 - then 60 after that
Good day today
Not too busy with work so low stress levels
But if I am 100% honest, my reboot has not been at the forefront of my mind the past couple of days
It is there in the background but I feel I need to focus on it more
In previous reboot attempts, I've always slipped whenever I started to become complacent, so I don't want that to happen this time
It's late now and I need to go to bed so no time for commenting on other posts, but I hope you are all doing well in your own struggles. Stay strong!
Thank you @Blondie!
Yes my sights are set on getting to 45 days now - halfway to 90 - then 60 after that
Good day today
Not too busy with work so low stress levels
But if I am 100% honest, my reboot has not been at the forefront of my mind the past couple of days
It is there in the background but I feel I need to focus on it more
In previous reboot attempts, I've always slipped whenever I started to become complacent, so I don't want that to happen this time
It's late now and I need to go to bed so no time for commenting on other posts, but I hope you are all doing well in your own struggles. Stay strong!
Chuckles
Active Member
I get that. I'm looking for that balance between not thinking about it all the time, but being aware that I could slip. Easier said than done.
viking1234
Active Member
You are doing great, pal! Keep on and don't lay back