I will make it -- Looking forward to taking my life back

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 540 no porn
Day 120 cold showers
Day 73 meditation

Well I'm pretty sure I know what's up. I hit a flatline I think a few days ago after that porn dream. Maybe it was overstimulation from the series of MO's I had a few days prior but today I tried to MO but wasn't feeling it much at all except for a brief spike at the beginning. Afterwards it's like my brain just completely lost interest and it was a struggle to maintain an erection. I'm not really worried about it because I've seen this tape before and a few weeks ago had sex without issue and had a bunch of great MO's since then. Weird how the flatline is hitting even now

How do I know it's flatline? Well because in the middle of my MO sessh I started thinking 'what if I used porn' and just thought for a moment but literally felt no desire. I even thought about a super hot girl and just didn't feel interested. It's like my brain just shut my libido off. Anyway I'll need to abstain from MO for a while, don't want to overdo it anyway

Read some reboot stories also where Gabe mentions to ease into it after you start getting good boners (i.e. space orgasms apart). I definitely overdid it on the MO front which I think is what sent me back into flatline. Gotta take it slow, I guess I got really excited on getting regular erections again and went a little too crazy with it

Edit: Actually MO'd some time later and got hard without much issue (same girl from gym). Wasn't the greatest MO but wasn't bad either. Really weird how this works (I also stayed in the moment this time). Regardless, I need to take some time between MO's and just space it out

 

[NYC]

Day 540 no porn
Day 120 cold showers
Day 73 meditation

Well I'm pretty sure I know what's up. I hit a flatline I think a few days ago after that porn dream. Maybe it was overstimulation from the series of MO's I had a few days prior but today I tried to MO but wasn't feeling it much at all except for a brief spike at the beginning. Afterwards it's like my brain just completely lost interest and it was a struggle to maintain an erection. I'm not really worried about it because I've seen this tape before and a few weeks ago had sex without issue and had a bunch of great MO's since then. Weird how the flatline is hitting even now

How do I know it's flatline? Well because in the middle of my MO sessh I started thinking 'what if I used porn' and just thought for a moment but literally felt no desire. I even thought about a super hot girl and just didn't feel interested. It's like my brain just shut my libido off. Anyway I'll need to abstain from MO for a while, don't want to overdo it anyway

Read some reboot stories also where Gabe mentions to ease into it after you start getting good boners (i.e. space orgasms apart). I definitely overdid it on the MO front which I think is what sent me back into flatline. Gotta take it slow, I guess I got really excited on getting regular erections again and went a little too crazy with it

Edit: Actually MO'd some time later and got hard without much issue (same girl from gym). Wasn't the greatest MO but wasn't bad either. Really weird how this works (I also stayed in the moment this time). Regardless, I need to take some time between MO's and just space it out

I'm 61 and I have had the exact same experience with the MOs. Im 45 days no P. Your post helped me feel normal!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 544 no porn
Day 124 cold showers
Day 77 meditation
Day 1 no MO

Going to avoid MO'ing for a while and get my brain chemistry right. Otherwise no big things to update

 

[Blondie]

Looking good @First_step_thousand_miles.

Going to avoid MO'ing for a while and get my brain chemistry right. Otherwise no big things to update

Sounds like a plan. Are you still hanging out with the girl, or did you decide to move on?

Best brother.

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Looking good @First_step_thousand_miles.

Sounds like a plan. Are you still hanging out with the girl, or did you decide to move on?

Best brother.

Thanks my man -- it's sort of fizzling out, which is fine as I'm not quite as into her as I initially thought. Either way, my goal right now is to reset my brain a bit. Kind of strange because just a week ago I was MO'ing to this really normal girl and I had maybe some of the best MO's of my life, turned on by the slightest thing. Yet now with the same girl I need to imagine 'harder' stuff to keep it going. There is such a thing as overload I think, esp for us folks who used porn and constantly escalated for new highs. I guess that's why most people on avg in relationships only have sex 1-3x a week, anything more and we're just not desiring it as much (naturally speaking).

Either way, not getting too into my head about it. The point of this is to just realize, quitting porn wasn't to just to then be able to MO without porn (although that is certainly welcome) -- it's to find LT partners and move on with our lives

 

[Blondie]

There is such a thing as overload I think, esp for us folks who used porn and constantly escalated for new highs. I guess that's why most people on avg in relationships only have sex 1-3x a week, anything more and we're just not desiring it as much (naturally speaking).

I think this is a good point. Just over doing anything for that matter will make it not as fun or pleasurable in the long run. I think you're on the right track @First_step_thousand_miles.

Either way, not getting too into my head about it. The point of this is to just realize, quitting porn wasn't to just to then be able to MO without porn (although that is certainly welcome) -- it's to find LT partners and move on with our lives

Yes indeed! You got this

Love ya.

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

I think this is a good point. Just over doing anything for that matter will make it not as fun or pleasurable in the long run. I think you're on the right track @First_step_thousand_miles.

Yes indeed! You got this

Love ya.

Love you too my friend. Often I just reach down there due to boredom! Amazing how that afflicts us...when TV, video games, gym, etc all are done I feel like sometimes I'm looking for an even bigger high (hence the MO). Overdoing the MO makes our brain overly used to that high and so then we crave an even bigger high (like porn). It's a cycle tube wary of for sure

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 548 no porn
Day 127 cold showers
Day 81 meditation
Day 4 no MO

 

[Blondie]

How's your meditation going for you @First_step_thousand_miles?

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

How's your meditation going for you @First_step_thousand_miles?

Hey my friend -- overall it's definitely been a net benefit to my life. I started at 10min a day before pushing to 15-20min and now back at 10-15min. Just need to make it a bigger priority and do it in the evening well before bed (instead of doing it right before bed as that can just make you sleepy & distracted which makes the meditation less effective)

Overall the quality of the meditation itself varies a ton, sometimes I'm very distracted and sometimes more focused. Either way, I would recommend the habit as I feel calmer and more in control of my life. Going to make a point of it to do it for 15-20min in afternoons or before 10pm

Not totally sure what the benefits are with regards to self control / cravings (maybe modest?) but it's been a pretty good journey. Doing it well is very hard though haha

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 550 no porn
Day 129 cold showers
Day 83 meditation
Day 6 no MO

Welp I had several wet dreams last night. I think they were mostly vanilla but not sure, and I did indeed orgasm. I'm going to continue keeping the no MO streak going on here since it wasn't a conscious orgasm. Very odd how the wet dreams work out, I've had streaks with no MO for 2 months and there's nothing and other times it's been less than a month (in this case a week!) and I've MO'd.

Not alarmed or anything, I'm just documenting it here since it seemed interesting. Otherwise, noticing porn itself has a FAR weaker pull on me than ever. I still get cravings (often triggered by either boredom or feeling shitty about something) but they are generally pretty easy to swat away vs. heart palpitating and completely inability to focus on anything else). I still get the occasional stronger craving (though weaker than I remember in the first few months of starting the reboot) but I'm soldiering on. It does become easier folks, gotta keep up the good fight!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Double post today but wanted to flag an important warning for folks who might follow this page. I was randomly scrolling Twitter today (pretty uncommon occurrence) just to see Elon Musk's page (interesting guy lol). Literally maybe 5-6 posts down there was a post titled 'AI creates the most beautiful woman in every country'...I was browsing that page for about 5min before I was like 'WTF am I doing' and exited. Now I didn't have that insane porn urge in my mind but there was a slight urge

Be INCREDIBLY careful with porn moving forward. AI will completely change the game, from AI generated porn images (personalized to whatever you want) to AI porn video to AI girlfriends (just read on reddit about the number of guys who already have one despite the first AI gf only coming out 6 months ago) to AI sexting to AI influencers to everything else you can imagine. I'm so, so, so grateful that I started the reboot mid last year and got momentum going before all these tools proliferated.

Unfortunately, this will only get worse over time...I'm terrified for Gen Z and even more so Gen Alpha. These kids will enter adolescence in a period where AI porn is the norm rather than 'the new thing.' I'm even afraid for myself but I'll keep the ball rolling (so at this point the burning urge for novelty isn't there, more of a mild curiosity that I can control).

Please, please, please be incredibly vigilant! @Blondie @SmokenMirrors @GBS @Androg @Ezel . It would make me incredibly sad if any of us fell prey to this. As much as people talk about social media and even porn in recent years damaging society, I suspect this will be a drop in the ocean compared to what AI will do. Porn from the 2010s is like heroin but I think the porn in the 2020s will be like Fentanyl (50x stronger). Damn, I wish I could waive a wand and stop this shit right now but I can't...all I can do is warn members of this community and hope for the best. Love you all, keep your guards up, break free of this shit and never look back!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 552 no porn
Day 130 cold showers
Day 84 meditation
Day 8 no MO

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 556 no porn
Day 134 cold showers
Day 88 meditation
Day 2 no MO

 

[Blondie]

Looking good man. Not too far off from the big 600!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Looking good man. Not too far off from the big 600!

Thank you man! Yup, just grinding it out day by day

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 557 no porn
Day 135 cold showers
Day 89 meditation
Day 3 no MO

Does it ever bother you how much of a sexualized society we live in? I wouldn't normally go pondering this but it's so, so, so hard to avoid! You can more easily avoid actual porn -- or I should so hardcore porn -- but soft-core porn is literally everywhere (even if it isn't termed that in most settings).

For instance, anyone see ads for Temu (new social commerce company)? Half of those ads are some girl with a ridiculous body wearing clothes. I'm not overly drawn to that, but I'd be lying if I said it was always something I don't think twice about vs. sometimes needing to take a few seconds to block from my mind. It's incredibly annoying to do as someone who uses the internet for regular things like shopping, reading the news, streaming shows, researching, etc. I've already installed ad-blockers but there's a limit to how much those can block

All good as the temptations are slight and generally easy to bat away, but sometimes it does incite an urge to MO (not to the picture necessarily but just release my sexual energy to at least some girl I know). I avoid MO'ing as much as possible in these situations -- even if it is to a normal girl I know in real life -- as I want to be extra careful to avoid the porn pathways, but it's like death by a thousand cuts sometimes. This is coming from someone who doesn't have an IG / TikTok / Snap and doesn't use Facebook / LinkedIn often!

The only thing I can do beyond this is just not use the internet which is certainly not a viable option in 2023 for a working adult under 30. Sometimes I really wish I was born 30-40yrs earlier...technology promised to make life better but outside healthcare advancements, it's largely been net negative everywhere else. Anyway, I just had to get this off my chest. I don't think I'm the only one feeling this way but it has been bothering me for a while. Anyone else have any thoughts / solutions to this?

 

[Ezel]

Day 557 no porn
Day 135 cold showers
Day 89 meditation
Day 3 no MO

Does it ever bother you how much of a sexualized society we live in? I wouldn't normally go pondering this but it's so, so, so hard to avoid! You can more easily avoid actual porn -- or I should so hardcore porn -- but soft-core porn is literally everywhere (even if it isn't termed that in most settings).

For instance, anyone see ads for Temu (new social commerce company)? Half of those ads are some girl with a ridiculous body wearing clothes. I'm not overly drawn to that, but I'd be lying if I said it was always something I don't think twice about vs. sometimes needing to take a few seconds to block from my mind. It's incredibly annoying to do as someone who uses the internet for regular things like shopping, reading the news, streaming shows, researching, etc. I've already installed ad-blockers but there's a limit to how much those can block

All good as the temptations are slight and generally easy to bat away, but sometimes it does incite an urge to MO (not to the picture necessarily but just release my sexual energy to at least some girl I know). I avoid MO'ing as much as possible in these situations -- even if it is to a normal girl I know in real life -- as I want to be extra careful to avoid the porn pathways, but it's like death by a thousand cuts sometimes. This is coming from someone who doesn't have an IG / TikTok / Snap and doesn't use Facebook / LinkedIn often!

The only thing I can do beyond this is just not use the internet which is certainly not a viable option in 2023 for a working adult under 30. Sometimes I really wish I was born 30-40yrs earlier...technology promised to make life better but outside healthcare advancements, it's largely been net negative everywhere else. Anyway, I just had to get this off my chest. I don't think I'm the only one feeling this way but it has been bothering me for a while. Anyone else have any thoughts / solutions to this?

I'm percent with you on this man, the barrier between these social media and filth hub is fading away by the second. Sometimes I feel like Tupac when he said it's just me against the world. God help us all.

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

I'm percent with you on this man, the barrier between these social media and filth hub is fading away by the second. Sometimes I feel like Tupac when he said it's just me against the world. God help us all.

True that man. For those of us who've escaped porn, we notice this more but I didn't think twice about this when I was using it. Just figured it was normal...that's the world kids are growing up in today. Absolutely wild to see this has been normalized

Same thing at the gym. Some girl is wearing the most provocative possible clothing and filming herself, and you're a weirdo if you look over? Obviously I can't say anything like this in the outside world -- because women empowerment or whatever we're calling it these days -- but it's way harder to just be a man doing his day to day things vs. constantly thinking about sex. I'm sure 100 years ago people thought about sex and had it 1-2x a week, but these days even if I'm not horny I see something like this (maybe terming it 'super-normal' stimuli) and I suddenly am...it's not natural vs. the pre internet world

I just don't want to be horny that often! How is that any different from porn where you masturbate way beyond excess? When I'm out an about I try to just follow the 2 second rule but it's just everywhere...online, outside, etc. Just an annoying struggle sometimes, I know I'm not the only one who's dealt with it though which at least makes me feel better

 

[Ezel]

True that man. For those of us who've escaped porn, we notice this more but I didn't think twice about this when I was using it. Just figured it was normal...that's the world kids are growing up in today. Absolutely wild to see this has been normalized

Same thing at the gym. Some girl is wearing the most provocative possible clothing and filming herself, and you're a weirdo if you look over? Obviously I can't say anything like this in the outside world -- because women empowerment or whatever we're calling it these days -- but it's way harder to just be a man doing his day to day things vs. constantly thinking about sex. I'm sure 100 years ago people thought about sex and had it 1-2x a week, but these days even if I'm not horny I see something like this (maybe terming it 'super-normal' stimuli) and I suddenly am...it's not natural vs. the pre internet world

I just don't want to be horny that often! How is that any different from porn where you masturbate way beyond excess? When I'm out an about I try to just follow the 2 second rule but it's just everywhere...online, outside, etc. Just an annoying struggle sometimes, I know I'm not the only one who's dealt with it though which at least makes me feel better

Hang in there brother, don't lose hope. Actually the thing you said about you witnessing the degenerate things going out in the world is a proof that your mind is getting cleaned up, a mind who is so obsessed with porn and sex can't see what you just saw. It reminded me when neo started to see the code of the matrix. You just found a glitch my friend.
You know what you got to do next.