Day 11
Smooth sailing. Yesterday came across a soft-P image while just doing the normal web browsing. Didn't even phase me. I was like cute then just moved on.
In the morning some P scene came up. I just acknowledge the thought, accepted it, then gently brushed it aside. I don't need to hold space or urge surf this.
There is wisdom to know when to hold space / urge surf and when to just say No, thank you.
As the days progress the time where I always relapse is when P thoughts are mixed with high sex drive / high sexual energy. This is where I can't handle it. It becomes a mess and then I engage with P, usually backing off from P and then going for MO.
As I am expecting the sexual energies to start building up again. Maybe this time around I can at a minimum keep the P away and if needed I'll just go with a MO or better yet just hold space / urge surf the physical sensations?
Will see. Grateful I get to do this until I figure it out.
With the work I am doing, if the sexual energy is low to medium it is smooth sailing. When the sexual energy gets high together with the unmet need for intimacy I relapse. So this is the area I am working on now.
Wishing everyone a great Sunday. See you tomorrow.
EW