I will make it -- Looking forward to taking my life back

[Blondie]

This looks fantastic @First_step_thousand_miles. I really like that you have this all thought through. You can definitely accomplish this if you put your mind to it. Look how far you've already come with porn.

As always, thanks for inspiring

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

This looks fantastic @First_step_thousand_miles. I really like that you have this all thought through. You can definitely accomplish this if you put your mind to it. Look how far you've already come with porn.

As always, thanks for inspiring

Thank you my man. I suspect quitting porn is just the beginning, it helps your life a LOT but there's a lot of other areas for improvement too...at least in my experience. I can't control the world, but I can control myself. And there's a bunch of things I really need to improve on to get to where I want to be. The main thing being getting in good shape. Would love to hear a Goals post from you in your thread my man (aside from staying away from porn of course) if you're open to sharing (all good if not!)

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 260 -- Just checking in, no big things to say. One thing that crossed my mind is that I guess I haven't experienced some of the things certain rebooters talk about (way more confidence, music sounds better, etc). Not complaining though! I didn't go in expecting that stuff -- and besides I know what I can do to get to where I want to be (comes down to my Goals post from a few days ago). Working out and getting in shape I suspect is the next big milestone, while simultaneously staying away from porn. And talking a lot more to girls, I have noticed I naturally do that more now that I've stopped PMO'ing. So all to say, everyone's experience is different and the benefits I've gotten thus far have been 100000% worth giving up porn. I'm never going back

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 263 - All good on the home front. Had a great MO a few days ago, I'm in the rhythm. The pathways of getting hard to porn are definitely dying, I wouldn't say it's 0% arousal 100% of the time to certain scenes in regular TV shows / movies, but maybe 0% about 50% of the time, and 10-20% in the other 50%. So overall a really welcome shift

EDIT: Fantastic MO today as well to a girl that I would not have been able to get it up to a year ago or even 6 months ago. Just incredible. I keep mentioning these but I do it because I'm really in awe of it each time. 100% the range of girls you're attracted to and the body types along with age / race / etc expands soooooo much. Very good stuff

 

[Blondie]

Great to hear brother, especially about the new variety of women that you now can get sexual about. This is probably one of the best aspects of this, just to be turned again by real women around you. I know in my case, just being turned on like crazy for my girlfriend again, was one of the best parts of this whole journey!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 269 -- Heya fellas, just checking in. Nothing to really report on my front, just trying to get much better about my diet. Had some hand pain working out yesterday so backing off for a few days and planning to see an OT on it to figure out why my grip stretch is so garbage. Otherwise pretty solid

 

[Blondie]

Sounds good @First_step_thousand_miles.

An OT should be able to help you out on that. I'm sending good vibes your way!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Sounds good @First_step_thousand_miles.

An OT should be able to help you out on that. I'm sending good vibes your way!

Thank you sir. Yeah I'm not sure why, I don't have chronic pain or anything but whenever I get into lifting there will me times when my hands get really painful doing some kind of lift. Usually a pull exercise / hangs but yesterday even happened doing a cable press which was odd. The pain goes away from a few days of rest but it's really made ramping up on lifting very hard. Thankfully can still do cardio and continue to lose weight but it's making it really hard to build mass. Hopefully the OT has some ideas haha

How are you doing my man?

 

[Blondie]

but whenever I get into lifting there will me times when my hands get really painful doing some kind of lift. Usually a pull exercise / hangs but yesterday even happened doing a cable press which was odd.

Interesting. Maybe poor grip strength? I know if you haven't been at it in a while, that could set you off for sure.

Thankfully can still do cardio and continue to lose weight but it's making it really hard to build mass

Yes, there's always something you can do! Go for it.

How are you doing my man?

I'm doing fine, stressed actually, but life is good. I spent all day fixing the brakes on my car with money I don't have, and now I'm writing scholarships for school for money I hope to have. Which... I should probably get back to.

But no porn here, and that's all that matters. Nice to know I can say that at least.

Best man.

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Interesting. Maybe poor grip strength? I know if you haven't been at it in a while, that could set you off for sure.

Yes, there's always something you can do! Go for it.

I'm doing fine, stressed actually, but life is good. I spent all day fixing the brakes on my car with money I don't have, and now I'm writing scholarships for school for money I hope to have. Which... I should probably get back to.

But no porn here, and that's all that matters. Nice to know I can say that at least.

Best man.

Thanks my man, yeah grip strength is for sure an issue for me. It's super weak, gotta figure out how to safely push that up

Yeah man, I feel like everything is stupid expensive these days. Will keep my fingers crossed for you on those scholarships!

Hey, as long as you adhere to no porn life and its amazing possibilities will always be open my man. Not all cylinders in life fire at the same time (or they'll only all fire for brief moments before there's yet another fire to put out lol) but that's just the nature of real life. That said, we sure as hell can work towards a future to be proud of. The journey is really amazing, I constantly forget to think about this while being overly focused on the destination....but I suspect once you're 65 / 70 / 75, you're going to really appreciate the journey more. Proud of you buddy

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 270 -- 9 months in. MO'd today, actually wasn't the strongest. But that's just the nature of the path, I'm sure the strong ones will appear again. Maybe next time, maybe in a few weeks, but they'll appear. Anyway, continuing to stay away from porn

I've officially lost most of my interest in porn. Even when a nude scene comes up on a movie or if I'm watching an anime that gets risqué, I pretty much feel little to no desire most of the time to want to use porn. Really great stuff, those pathways have really been dying off. I never thought I'd get to this level, really feels surreal. I'm certainly not fully recovered, but definitely at least 2/3 of the way there I think. I know I'll get to 100% one day if I stay on the path

 

[Blondie]

Congrats on 9 months brother!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Congrats on 9 months brother!

Thank you my friend, we're slowly but surely getting to becoming the men we always knew we could be. Proud to be on this journey with you brother

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 272 -- MO'd standing up today, not super strong. Definitely periods of hardness and softness, usually I've only MO'd lying down and those have been generally solid in the past month. Has anyone else had that issue at all? I wonder if when I do MO it's a good idea to mix up lying down and standing, maybe my body's too conditioned to lying down. I remember when I first discovered masturbation I used to only do standing for like a year (though using porn at the time) before transitioning later to lying down which I've done for the past 7yrs or so barring maybe 1-2 dozen times or so standing in that period. I guess I could get hard though I needed way more stimulation mentally in order to stay hard standing (vs. lying down where it was way less mental stimulation necessary)

Side note -- I think maybe I'm MO'ing a bit too much these days, 4-5x a week feels like a lot. I need to take some time away from MO'ing and come back to it later, otherwise I think the sensation is coming down a lot. Going to seriously contemplate no MO for some time though

EDIT: I read an account just now (https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/reb...ne-from-the-complete-worst-pied-to-100-cured/) of a guy who went through something similar. Basically slowly got better over 8 months of no PMO, but in initial days of sex had trouble doing standing doggy. After rewiring though this went away after about 3-4 months (post the 8 months reboot). I think there are probably two key things for me here incl 1) either cutting out or drastically reducing MO and 2) just rewiring. At the end of the day, I need to rewire to real sex and the pace / cadence in order to get to 100%. I think I've gotten most of the way there from just the reboot -- though I can still push farther over the next few months no doubt -- but at some point (who knows when) rewiring will be the final step to really getting to 100% I think (vs. staying stuck at 70% of 80% or whatever you want to call it)

What else can I do now? Well, I'm at a healthy weight though my cardio isn't very good to be honest. I'm going to be much more rigorous about at least 3 days of solid cardio a week and 3 days of solid lifting a week as both are really good for improving quality of erections. In a few more months I'll see where I'm at and if it makes sense add in kegels. But also in a bit, want to really get out there with girls and start dating to get the rewiring process going. I'm more comfortable around women these days vs my porn filled days though not quite 100%. Need to really work on getting there

 

[Blondie]

That's a great link, thanks for sharing @First_step_thousand_miles. I tell you what, just reading stories like that gets my pumped!

I think you're on to something here and maybe cutting out (or mostly) MO would be very beneficial for your recovery. I know it's not easy to do (hell I've only done it not even 90 days altogether over the last 500 days), but whenever I have, I've noticed gigantic improvements, and sometimes, almost instantaneously. I think everyone comes at this from different angles, obviously I didn't have to work on the rewiring process as much as someone without a girlfriend/partner, however, the ease of me being able to get off, although in a healthy way, has also slowed down my recovery. Does this fact really bother me? No, but, I do think it's true and something to think about. Maybe for yourself, go as long as possible, then use that built up energy to find a lady to get that rewiring process going, even if only for one beautiful night.

I think both sides have their positives and negatives, but I tell you what, not even 20 days in and I'm feeling more virile than a rock star. Note to self, don't get cocky!

Either way, you're killing it!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

That's a great link, thanks for sharing @First_step_thousand_miles. I tell you what, just reading stories like that gets my pumped!

I think you're on to something here and maybe cutting out (or mostly) MO would be very beneficial for your recovery. I know it's not easy to do (hell I've only done it not even 90 days altogether over the last 500 days), but whenever I have, I've noticed gigantic improvements, and sometimes, almost instantaneously. I think everyone comes at this from different angles, obviously I didn't have to work on the rewiring process as much as someone without a girlfriend/partner, however, the ease of me being able to get off, although in a healthy way, has also slowed down my recovery. Does this fact really bother me? No, but, I do think it's true and something to think about. Maybe for yourself, go as long as possible, then use that built up energy to find a lady to get that rewiring process going, even if only for one beautiful night.

I think both sides have their positives and negatives, but I tell you what, not even 20 days in and I'm feeling more virile than a rock star. Note to self, don't get cocky!

Either way, you're killing it!

These success stories really are motivational!

Thanks for your support my dude, you've brought up a lot of great points. I want to accelerate my recovery as much as possible and cutting out MO as much as possible (ideally 90 days but honestly I'll be happy if I make it to 30 days and then it's just 1x a week or so) is the next big step. Really heartening to hear about your improvements when you've cut out MO as well

The reason you feel more virile than a rock star is because you are one my man, you are the Paul McCartney of Reboot Nation haha. Love you bud, thanks for all your support. Your advice is absolutely invaluable to me. It was when I started my journey and it still is now. Let's move forward my man!!!

 

[Blondie]

That sounds like a great plan @First_step_thousand_miles.

Love you bud

No no, I love you!

Let's move forward my man!!!

Let's do it!

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Day 275 -- No MO since Day 273 (going on 3 days including today). Going to really give this a shot. Now that I'm thinking about it, would be awesome to push forward with no MO until I hit the 1yr mark (about 3 months away). But at the very least I want to go 30 days and see how that feels.

Now I realized earlier today that if I'm going forward with this plan, I need to be more careful about triggers. I mentioned earlier the typically what used to trigger me (nude scenes in movies / shows / anime / etc) rarely does anymore -- not 0% but maybe I only get a little triggered 10-20% of the time. However, that was also when I was MO'ing! I don't want to lock myself into a spot where I can't MO and I casually see these triggers, so I'm cutting out anime (cancelled my crunchy roll account) entirely for some time. I'm also going to be careful on what I watch on TV. Don't play video games very often anyway so nothing to do there. I'm going to instead spend those hours working out / cooking / finishing up that big work project / reading (essentially the Goals for 2023 post stuff) -- the common thread is self-improvement but also stuff that I enjoy / am learning to enjoy which is critical in sticking with these goals.

A LONGER ASIDE, SOME PERSONAL MUSINGS ABOUT LIFE STAGES -- I'm realizing I enjoy anime less and less these days vs. my college years / early-mid 20s. Guess that's part of the whole 'maturity' thing people talked about -- at the rate of the current trajectory, I'm virtually certain to not watch anime anymore in my 30s. I guess it's in the same way that people outgrow a lot of stuff they loved when they were kids / teens / young adults -- when you're at that age, you can't imagine how you wouldn't be interested in that thing when you're 30 but the closer you get there the more that stuff fades away.

I always knew this but it's really hitting home how a lot of that stuff (i.e. anything fiction, whether reading / TV / video games / movies) offers somewhat of an 'escape' from real life. I think that's still ok in small doses, but it's when we fully live in those worlds and neglect the real world to where it becomes a significant negative on our lives. I guess for years, I contented myself with these kind of virtual experiences -- though I'm now realizing I want to get at these things in the real world. Anything you get digitally I think is great in the moment, but it's ephemeral. It doesn't last. Only by building true real life experiences (getting awesome at your job which you love / finding interesting hobbies like MMA or golf or hiking or whatever) and connections (family / friends / girlfriend or wife or whatever) do we truly become better men...it's not just about being better men for some vague purpose, but these things will bring us greater, LONG-term joy than the short-term joy we get from digital stuff (porn is the classic issue here).

I just realized, even as I'm writing all this, maybe the biggest part of what held me back in this 'digital' world was porn. Now that I no longer use it, I'm just naturally more interested in the real world. What a subtle, crazy thing. I'm glad to have gotten rid of porn, I want to really embrace what it is to live, laugh, and love. And I firmly believe that it's all rooted in the real world. I intend to get there one day. I'll keep you fellas updated on where I'm at with a lot of these goals as I go along, porn is the biggest block but it's still just the start in getting to fulfilling our max potential. Love all you boys and I'm proud to be part of this community

 

[First_step_thousand_miles]

Double post but I wanted to share two quotes that have really resonated with me in becoming a better man, I hope these resonate with folks reading this as well:

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step - Lao Tzu. This was always comforting to me because any great journey just beings with one foot forward. JUST BEGIN AND YOU CAN MAKE IT

If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else. It will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them - Bruce Lee. You are capable of way more than you think, push beyond and you'll break past your self-imposed limitations. Your mind / body will provide the strength as you expose it to more stressors

I'm a big motivational quotes nerd so I'll keep sharing more as time goes on. But I hope these two provide some comfort / motivation to folks, we are truly capable of anything that we put our mind to. You are all special, amazing human beings way more than I think you realize. Let's get after it boys!

 

[Blondie]

This is a beautiful post @First_step_thousand_miles , thanks! I absolutely agree. Living in digital worlds or fantasies (even good ones) is a sign of immaturity. Obviously, nothing wrong with some of it, but at it's heart, it's escapism, and if our lives are really that bad, we should ask ourselves, what we can do to make them better.

Love this post man, I don't have much time to comment, but it was great.

Best