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This occurs to me, and is how I really feel now after my first relapse since I started a few days ago. I will update my journal with this relapse. It is just that the pain that this addiction has caused me over almost 20 years is awful, and the drama it has caused me in lost friendships with...

Good evening! I didn't know whether I would be coming back here for this journey as social media is definitely not a healthy place for me and is one of the things I am not allowed on for my mental health, but my intuition says that if I don't write my journey here I will just go back to Reddit...

I am just going to go out and say it. It sounds almost heretical but the longer I keep it bottled inside the worse it gets. [Bear in mind I am only 2 days sober of porn, so it is quite possible that I have no idea what I am talking about, and also I have never had PIED]. I always had...

I'm interested in how fellow porn addicts use the internet responsibly for legitimate purposes, such as studying, looking up recipes, etc. I know a lot of people use porn blocking software, but unfortunately we don't have much room in the budget for that at the moment so I have to go without...

Hello all, I have just started the Way of the Superior Man by David Deida because it is lauded in addiction and recovery circles as a great book for rebuilding and fixing marriage in the wake of addiction. I see why. I am only 30 pages in or so, and there are a lot of good ideas. It is...

So folks, I am back in these rooms. I have been gone a long time, and to make a long story short, yes I was relapsing for a long time, with both porn and alcohol, and finally relapsing just became going back to being an active drinker/user of porn. Now, thanks to daily AA meetings, working...

[Trigger warning] I find myself thinking a lot, even in these early days about what could have been, if I had never seen my first porn images, never sipped my first beer (I realize this isn't a problem for everyone here, but it is for me, and it does relate to my porn use). I find myself...

Hello gents, I have decided to start a new journal in a new effort to take this more seriously after several repeated failures. I had no idea going into this how difficult this would really be. I'm not sure why because I have been battling this for more than 20 years now. Compared to quitting...

Moderators, feel free to delete if this post is inappropriate for this forum. I understand it might not be the right place. But if these gets seen by only a few eye balls then I will at least feel like I have been heard. I promise to turn this back towards porn addiction at the end. I have...

As I recount in my journal I am battling two addictions, alcohol and porn, and I try to be brutally honest in talking about the process. It is not insignificant that both of my addictions are to products that are legal and more than this, accepted and supported by society. They are "normal"...

Last post I promise, but this is another odd quirk I've noticed over the past 15 years, and two relationships, while I've dealt with porn addiction. I was often very selfish about sex. Secretly I wanted it all the time, but I wasn't good at nonverbally initiating it (which is what I think...

Hello all, I just wanted to maybe explore this a little and ask if other PAs can also identify with this as a problem, or source of problems. I have had 2 adult relationships (which I would define as including sex and living with the other person) in my life, that being with my now wife and my...

Hello all, Richard here Back here a few months or so after I first came back to this board. The title says it all. I am glad I am here finally starting the good fight, taking my life back, but porn and alcohol have done their toll on me and my life and I'm not in especially good place at the...

Hello all. I am about to start my journal in the journaling section, but I just had to get it off my chest. The global sex industry has made such huge victims of all of us in their incessant greed for more and more money. It is a smear on society that some of the biggest, most successful...